Return to John Island
by Catchick10
Summary: Sequel to Cullens at Camp . . . Esme sends her kids back to John Island Camp for the March break. Very OOC, T for language and mild sexual references.
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, so this is my new story . . . it is a sequel to Cullens at Camp, and although you don't _have _to read that one to get this, there will be some characters/references from the first story that you won't understand. I would reccomend reading the other one first. i don't own Twilight. Enjoy :)**

_Alice POV_

"I'm not going."

Esme sighed. I had been telling her for days that I did not want to go back to John Island. In fact, none of us really did. And if anyone did, they weren't gonna say that out of fear of being beaten up by the rest of us.

"If you don't listen to me, I'll post that video," she threatened.

"One of these days I'm gonna post that video myself so you don't have anything to blackmail me with," I grumbled, but I brought my bags out to the car.

I have to destroy that video. I've tried multiple times, but Esme always has copies. I mean, jeez . . . one little game of Truth or Dare gone wrong and your mother has instant blackmail. She has the video well hidden though. I've only ever found two copies. Even Edward doesn't know where it is.

"Esme?" Nessie asked.

"Yeah?"

"I can't go back to camp."

Esme sighed. "Why not?"

"I got kicked out. They're not gonna let me back in."

"Oh, don't worry. Carlisle took care of that."

"How?"

"I may or may not have paid them a large amount of money," Carlisle, who had just entered, said.

"So you bribed them," I said.

"I may or may not have."

I rolled my eyes and got in the car. Esme got in the driver's seat and we began the long drive to John Island.

_Edward POV_

Emmett, Jasper, Jacob and I were in Carlisle's car. At first, we were all gonna drive ourselves, then Carlisle realized that if we were left alone, we wouldn't even go to camp. We'd skip out and go somewhere fun. So, we all got to drive together. Yay.

After a few hours of silence, Emmett yelled, "Let's play the liscense plate game!"

Jacob, having never played this game with Emmett, said, "That is the most boring game ever. Let's not play it."

"Not our version," I sighed. "In our version, we pick one person and then for the next ten liscense plates that go by, however many letters are in that state are how many times we get to punch that person."

"That's a little weird," Jacob said.

"I'm with you on that one, Jacob," Carlisle said. "I'm glad I'm the driver. It means I don't have to play."

"Jake goes first!" Emmett yelled.

"Do I have to?"

"Yeah. You're new."

We watched out the window for a while. We were in a rather remote section of northern Idaho, so there weren't many cars on the road. Finally, a car came by. We all leaned over to see what it said.

"Mississippi," Emmett read gleefully and then proceeded to punch Jacob eleven times.

Jacob seemed to have horrible luck at this game. The next state he saw was Massachussettes. Then it was Tennesee, and then Rhode Island. After that we saw two Canadian ones: British Columbia and the Northwest Territories. And it went on.

Next, it was my turn. I could hear Jacob thinking about punching me really hard since I'd punched him really hard (I still don't really like the fact that he's dating my daughter). A car drove by and we all looked. "Ohio."

"That's not fair!" Jacob cried. "I get all the long ones, and then you get Ohio?"

I grinned and read the next plate. "Idaho."

The next few that I got were Iowa, Maine, another Idaho and Texas.

After about fifteen more painful hours, we finally made it to camp. Emmett had insisted on playing the game the entire way there, and Jacob was practically black and blue.

When we got out of the car, Rosalie took one look at Jacob and said, "Did you play that retarded liscense plate game again?"

"No . . ."

Rosalie smacked Emmett on the head. "That has to be the stupidest game known to mankind."

"Well you're not a man and you're not kind, so don't worry about it."

Rosalie rolled her eyes. She probably would have slapped Emmett again, but the boat had pulled up and we had to get on. We all got on and prepared for our second John Island Adventure - hopefully this one didn't involve fires, monkeys and princesses.

_Nessie POV_

I was actually kinda excited to go back to camp. I'd had a lot of fun in the summer. And, I'd spoken to Rachelle (very briefly since she was grounded) and she said she was coming back. I have no idea how she pulled that off. I wonder if Erika will be stupid enough to put us in the same cabin . . . probably not.

Unlike last time, the boat ride over was fairly uneventful. Actually, considering the fact that it was March, we were lucky to get on the boat at all. I've never experienced it, but apparently Canadian winters are cold.

When we got there, Erika greeted my family with a friendly but wary smile. Well, except for me. She just glared at me, which kinda makes me wonder how much Carlisle had to pay to get me back in.

Erika started to hand out cabin assignments. I was in Eagle cabin this time. All I hoped was that I wasn't in a cabin with Victoria again.

Unfortunately, things don't always go my way.

**I know it was a little short . . . I should actually be studying right now but I am losing my Internet for a while as of Sept 30 so I thought I should put this up while I could. And I've heard that I may get Internet around Oct 12 but who knows . . . anyway, review please :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**As promised, another update before I lose my Internet . . . which is supposed to happen sometime today so I probably won't update for a while D: But anyway, I don't own Twilight. Enjoy :)**

_Alice POV_

When we arrived, we got our cabin assignments. I was in a cabin with Natalie . . . I think she was Rosalie's co-counselor last year. Bella's co-counselor was cindy. Neither of them knows anything about fashion, nor do they care, so I think they'll get along well. Rosalie was all mad because that girl that she didn't like was in her cabin. I told her that it could have been worse and she could have been with Natalie again.

We headed to our cabin and went inside. After we'd all unpacked, Natalie suggested that we play the Name Game, where everyone says their name and then three things about themselves. I don't see how that's even considered a game.

I started. "Hi. I'm Alice. I like shopping, fashion and my boyfriend Jasper. I live in Forks, Washington and I am 19 years old."

"Seriously?" one girl asked. "You're only, like, 4'10" or something."

"I'm aware of that."

Natalie went next. "Hi. My name is Natalie. I'm 19 years old, I'm a vegetarian and I am in college studying to be a biologist."

When everyone had gone, I said, "Okay, now for the hard part. Who can repeat all the names?"

"I can!" one girl cried. "I'm Sandra. That's Angela, and that's Hannah, and that's Maryn-"

She was cut off by a knock at the door. Erika let herself in and said, "Hey. Do you have room for another girl in here? We made a mistake when assigning cabins and we had to make a switch."

"Sure," Natalie said.

"Okay, cool. See you later," she said, and left.

We all looked at the girl whom Erika had just left standing at the door. When I got a good look at her, I reconized her immediately as Nessie's best friend and partner in crime.

After the introductions had been made, I asked her quietly, "How did you manage to get back into camp after they kicked you out?"

"I have my ways."

"And those ways would be?" I prompted.

"I'm not legally allowed to talk about that."

"Alrighty then. Good luck with that. So, why'd you have to switch cabins?"

"Well they put me in a cabin with Nessie," she replied. "Then Victoria realized that it wouldn't work cause she knew from last year and she told Erika, who said I had to leave. So I did."

_Nessie POV_

I was so mad at Victoria. I hated her before, but now that hate has gone to, like, epic loathing. Jeez, I sound like Emmett. But, anyway, Rachelle and I were put in the same cabin (which was probably a stupid idea but we weren't gonna complain). But the problem was, Victoria was our counselor, and she knew what we were like so she told Erika, who said that one of us had to leave. So now Rachelle is gone and I hate Victoria more than before. Like I said, epic loathing.

We were all sitting in our cabin. We were supposed to be unpacking, but nobody felt like doing it so we were just sitting there. Then there was a knock at the door.

Victoria opened it to see Erika and some other girl. "Hey. This is Katie."

"And?"

"She's in your cabin," Erika explained.

"And there's another girl in our cabin because why?"

"She was always in your cabin. She was just late getting here," Erika said, sounding slightly testy.

"Okay," Victoria said, and Erika left. Victoria said to Katie, "Uh, you can go bunk with Nessie," she pointed to the empty bunk underneath mine. Damn, I was hoping to get a bunk to myself.

"Okay," said Katie and she walked over. When she came closer, I thought that she looked a little familiar, but I did my best to shake that thought away. When she got there, she said, "Look, just for the record, I don't want to share a bunk with you either." And that was when I realized exactly who she was. FML.

_Emmett POV_

OMG, OMG, OMG! This is gonna be so awesome! I'm in . . . a cabin with a guy named Lucas and then next to us is Edward and Charlie and across the path is Jake and Allan and Jasper and Liz! It's gonna be so freaking awesome!

We're gonna be able to talk to each other all night long and have slumber parties in each other's cabins. And we can go swimming and sailing and . . .

"It's winter, Emmett," Edward called from the next room.

"Thank you Captain Duh."

"You're welcome Sargeant Sarcasm. But anyway, we can't go swimming or sailing in the winter."

"Why not?" I asked. I didn't see any reason why we couldn't. It's not like we can get cold or anything.

"People would think we're different."

"We are different."

"Nevermind."

I don't see why Edward always has to criticize me. I know he thinks I'm dumb, but come on. I'm not that stupid. Oh well . . . I think this will be a good March break. And it's impossible to start a forest fire in the winter, so I'll be good.

**Review please and I'll update as soon as I can :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay, so, I wish I could say I have an excuse for not updating for a week, but I don't. I've just been really busy with school and stuff. And weirdly enough, my Internet didn't stop working a week ago like it was supposed to - not that I'm complaining. I don't own Twilight, but if I had a dollar for every time I said 'I don't own Twilight' I'd be as rich as Stephenie Meyer :P Enjoy :)**

_Alice POV_

We had gotten to camp around two, but by the time we got everyone in the right cabin and then made introductions and unpacked and all that jazz, it was about 5:30. Time for supper. I knew humans were slow, but I didn't think they were that slow.

We all went to the dining hall and lined up as usual. The counselors would stand on the steps and each cabin would line up in front of their counselor. Then, all the counselors would sing some song as the cabins went in one by one. It was stupid, but it was a tradition.

I joined in with the other counselors. "With a wing on the left, and a wing on the right, the birdies are sleeping, all set for the night." Then, we yelled, "SHHH! THE BIRDIES ARE SLEEPING!" Then we started to sing again. "The bright sun comes up, the dew falls away. Good morning, good morning, the little birds say." At that point, I was tired of singing so I let the kids in my cabin go inside.

We were having spaghetti and meatballs, not that it made a difference. Everything tasted like shit to me. After a while, my table ran out of juice, so I volunteered to go get some more. On my way to the counter, I passed Bella and Cindy's table, and I saw Cindy's freakishly ugly shirt. It was really bad. Embarassing, actually.

"Nice shirt," I snickered as I walked by.

She didn't say anything so I assumed that she'd ignored me. Then, I felt something hit the back of my head. I reached behind me and grabbed whatever was in my hair. Spaghetti.

I turned to Cindy and said, "Oh no you didn't."

"Oh yes, I did," she replied.

I decided to be mature and just walk away. I mean, after all, I'm almost 100 years old. I should be more mature than that. I went and got the juice. On the way back to my table, I had to pass Cindy again. That was when I decided that I was to young to be mature, and I threw the whole jug of juice on her.

Although most of it hit her, some flew past her and landed on Rosalie. Now, normally I wouldn't care if I hit someone else too, but when that someone else was Rosalie, that was pretty bad. I knew she wouldn't just let it go.

Thankfully, my visions and my experience with Rosalie allowed me to dodge the spaghetti she threw at me, but that meant it had to hit another person. That person tried to throw food back at Rosalie and completely failed, hitting someone else. And it went on and on.

It ended when Nessie tried to throw something at Katie, this girl that she didn't like, and missed. Erika, who had just walked in, was standing behind her and got hit smack in the face.

I didn't need my visions to know that that wasn't going to end well.

_Nessie POV_

I gasped when I saw who I had hit. Of all the people, why did it have to be her? Or I guess I should say, why did it have to be me? Either one would work. I looked up to see Erika glaring at me. Since she was withing hearing range, I said, "I know, I know. Your office. Now."

I thought I saw a trace of a smile on her face when she said that, but as I walked out the door, it disappeared. I didn't care though. I always knew that she secretly thought I was funny. I left and made my way to her office.

As I walked, I could hear her yelling at everyone in the dining hall to stop and telling them that they would have to clean up the mess. She said nobody would be leaving the dining hall until it was completely cleaned up. Other than me, I guess. She also said that there was gonna be a meeting for the counselors later. That couldn't be good.

I sat down in the chair in Erika's office that was now pretty much reserved for me. I waited for her to come in. I was actually kind of mad about being here, because everyone else had been throwing food too. Sure, I accidentally hit her, but it's not like I started the food fight or anything.

She appeared in the doorway. "So?"

"So what?" I asked.

"Do you have an explanation or not?"

"Yeah. I tried to hit Katie with food and I accidentally hit you instead," I said.

"Okay," she said. "Why were you throwing food at Katie in the first place?"

"She dumped milk on me," I explained, then demanded, "Why are you picking on me? I'm not the only one who threw food."

"I wasn't picking on you. I glared at you because you hit me in the face, but I never told you to come here. You just did. So I figured that while you were here, I'd ask you about it."

"So you wouldn't have made me come here?" I asked.

"No, that would have been picking on you."

"Mhmm."

"So, while you're here, I might as well ask you, did you start the food fight."

"No."

She raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Really."

"Well then who did?" she asked.

I thought back. It was . . . Alice and Cindy. I mean, technically, Cindy threw food first, but Alice provoked her. And before Alice threw food, it was just between the two of them.

I couldn't rat on Alice. She'd helped me out by lying for me and sneaking around in the summer. And she'd gotten in a lot of trouble for it too. I could at least repay the favour.

"I don't know," I lied.

"I don't believe you."

"That's nice, but it's not gonna make me change my answer. Whether you believe me or not, I still don't know."

"How could you not notice?"

"I was thinking about my boyfriend." Another lie. Jacob isn't really my boyfriend. Yet.

Erika rolled her eyes and said, "Okay then. I'll just have to ask someone else."

"I guess so."

**Review please. Reviews make me happy :D**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey :) Sorry it's been a while, but shortly after I posted the last chapter, I actually did lose my Internet and I didn't get a chance to update until now (I still don't have Internet . . . i'm on a train.) Enjoy :)**

_Rosalie POV_

I have to get back at Alice. She threw juice at me and got it in my hair. Well, I guess she technically didnt throw it at me, but it still hit me. And that triggered a food fight, which ended up with me having spaghetti all over my clothes and in my hair. She is so going down.

I'll have to ask Jacob to help me get back at her again. We were actually a pretty good team considering the fact that we hate each other. I don't know if we can beat our last prank, though. It was pretty epic.

I left the dining hall and went to go look for Jacob. I found him in his cabin. This time, I knocked before entering. You never know what boys might be doing.

He opened the door and said, "Hey, leech. What's up?"

I scowled at him and said, "Not much, mutt. I was just wondering if you're in the mood for some pranking."

"Well, that depends. Who are we pranking?"

"Alice."

"I'm game," he grinned. "Do you have any ideas?"

"Unfortunately, no. I was hoping that you'd have some ideas."

He thought for a minute. "Nope, I've got nothing."

I grimaced. This was going to be harder than I thought. I left and headed back to my cabin, hoping that I'd be able to come up with something throughout the course of the evening.

_Alice POV_

I was sitting on my bed after supper, planning some new outfits for Bella - that girl is hopeless when it comes to fashion - when I had a vision. The vision didn't tell me much - I saw Rosalie's future disappear and that was about it. I wasn't too concerned, since I'd gotten used to that happening ever since Jacob moved in, but I decided to go check it out just to be safe.

I headed toward Rosalie's cabin and knocked on the door. I was a little nervous because she was still mad about the juice. Rosalie can stay mad for a really long time if she wants to.

She opened the door and smiled when she saw me. "Alice," she said sweetly. "How are you?"

"Um . . . fine," I said, trying to hide my nervousness.

"You look nervous. Why is that?"

Gee, I don't know. Maybe it's because you can be an evil sadistic bitch when you're mad?

I didn't say that, though. I'm not suicidal. "No reason."

"Mhmm," Rosalie said. I could tell she didn't believe me. "So, what brings you here?"

"Well, I had a vision where your future disappeared and I just wanted to make sure you were okay," I explained, keeping my voice down so that the humans couldn't hear.

"I'm fine. Thanks for your concern. Goodbye now," she said, and shut the door in my face.

She is so plotting revenge. I'm screwed.

_Jacob POV_

I couldn't stop thinking about how Rosalie had asked me for help twice. Rosalie had always made such a point of hating me, and now she's come to me for help. Twice. Rosalie never asks anyone for help. I think she wants me.

Anyway, I couldn't think of any pranks to play on Alice, so I decided to ask the boys in my cabin for help. I walked into the middle of the cabin and said, "Can I have everyone's attention?" Everyone looked at me and waited for me to continue talking. "Thanks. So, there's this girl that I want to play a prank on. Anyone have any ideas for pranks?"

Everyone started to talk at once. "Woah! One at a time!" I called. "Jonathan, why don't you start?"

"You could cover her in honey and tie her to an ant hill," he suggested.

"I want to prank her, not kill her," I told him. "Next?"

Oscar, the boy next to Jonathan, said, "You could throw all her clothes in the lake."

"Hmmm . . . not bad," I said. It was kinda like the prank we did last year, but if we did it without buying her new clothes this year . . . well, that could be funny. Or scary. "Next?"

"You could fill her sleeping bag up with mud," the next boy suggested.

"That could work," I said. The only thing is, I don't know if Alice uses her sleeping bag. I guess we could fill it up anyway, cause there must be one point where she'll have to get in there just for show. Or we could fill her shoes up. She definately uses those. "Next?"

"Uh, you could put a spider on her pillow."

"Nah, she'd just eat it."

"What?"

Oops. Maybe I shouldn't have said that. It might have been giving away too much information.

"Uh, nothing. Next?"

"You could paint her face while she's sleeping. Or, even better, paint everyone else's face, then put the paints by her bed so it looks like she did it."

"Yeah . . ." I said vaguely. That would be perfect. If Alice slept. "Next?"

"You could sign her up for an activity she really hates."

"Mhmm." That could work, but what activity does Alice hate? She hates camping, but I think everyone has to do that. And she hates swimming, but it's winter, so the lake's frozen over. "Next?"

Nobody said anything. "Anyone?"

"Oh, I have another idea!"

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Tie her to the train tracks. There are some just before you get to the dock back on the mainland."

"Once again, Jonathan. Pranking, not killing."

"Right."

"Any more ideas?"

"Nope," was the collective answer.

Well, this sucks. I still don't know what to do. And it's time to go to our evening activity.

**Review please :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Yes, I know it's been three weeks :( but I now have highspeed internet :D So I can update waaaay more often :) This one's a little short but i hope you like it anyway :)**

_Bella POV_

We were sitting in our cabin, waiting for our evening activity to be announced. I thought it was skiing, which sucked. Skiing isn't great for the uncoordinated, even if the uncoordinated in question is a vampire.

Cindy asked me, "Is Alice Cullen your sister?"

"Yeah," I replied.

"How can you live with her?"

I knew exactly what she was getting at - the endles annoyance about hair, clothes and shoes, the burning of clothes. . .

"Sometimes, with great difficulty. But you get used to it," I told her.

"Really? I was in a cabin with her all summer and I didn't get used to it."

"It takes years," I explained.

"That makes sense," Cindy said.

We sat in silence for a moment, and then she said, "So, if I decided to plot revenge on her for harassing me, would you tell her?"

I thought about it for a minute. Alice would definately see it coming, so it wouldn't work, but she'd still probably be mad at me for not telling her. Oh well . . . you only live once.

"Nope. But I'll warn you, she has a way of finding things out . . . you really can't surprise her."

"How does she find out?"

"I don't know, she just does."

"Oh. Well, thanks for the warning, but I think I can manage."

"Suit yourself," I told her. "But you can't say I didn't warn you.

_Jasper POV_

We were just heading toward our evening activity, which was skiing through the bush or something, when Alice came and jumped on my back.

"Jasper!"

"Alice."

"You have to save me!" she exclaimed.

"From what?" I asked calmly. Alice tended to get a bit overexcited sometimes. For all I knew, I needed to protect her from Bella's outfit or something.

"Not from what, from who!"

I obliged. "Okay, then, from who?"

"Rosalie."

I rolled my eyes. "What did you do to irritate her now?"

"I threw juice at her. Well, not really at her, but it was in front of her and then it hit her and-"

"Alice, calm down. You're telling me that Rosalie's out to get you because you accidentally got a little juice on her?" Apparantly Alice isn't the only one in the family whose a little overexcitable.

"Yes!" she said urgently.

I laughed.

"It's not funny, Jasper! She's evil. Or she can be."

I laughed again. "Oh, I know. I've experienced it myself. Remember truth or dare from '52?"

It was Alice's turn to laugh. "Yeah, but that wasn't as bad as truth or dare last year. You know, with Mike Newton and that thing . . ."

"Yeah," I agreed, before she could say it. That is not something that I want to remember.

"You know Esme still has copies of that, eh?" she said.

"I thought we destroyed those."

"She has more."

"Where?" I asked. I really need to get my hands on these copies. They must be destroyed. Especially before Esme remembers YouTube. . .

"I don't know. Edward doesn't even know."

"Yikes."

"Yeah. So, back to the important topic. Well, the other important topic. Will you help me?"

"I think you can handle Rosalie," I said. "I mean, you can see the future."

"Yeah, but her future disappeared. I think she's working with Jacob."

"I'll help you," I agreed. Sometimes you need to agree with Alice, even if you don't actually agree. I've discovered that I won't get anything accomplished if I don't agree. I mean, I love her, but he can be a real pain. Don't tell her I said that.

**Review please :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Well, I think that was pretty good, time wise :) I wish I owned Twilight, but I don't. I also wish I owned a dog . . . anyway, enjoy :)**

_Bella POV_

Skiing time. Great. Just the thing for me. At least it's only cross country skiing, and not downhill. That would be disastrous.

We got dresses in our snowsuits - Canada has a lot of snow - and made our way to the dining hall to get our skis.

Once we are all fitted for skis and poles, we headed out. This was only a practise run - we were going out farther and staying overnight - in the snow - in a couple days. Canadians are crazy.

We had been skiing for about fifteen minutes when we came across a hill. Uh-oh. This wasn't part of the plan. How am I supposed to go down a hill when I can barely stand up on these things? I have to say, I'm glad I didn't try this while I was still human. I would have died!

"Okay," yelled Erika from her position at the front, "This is pretty much the only hill we'll come across while skiing. It is fairly steep, but I think you can handle it. If any of you have ever gone downhill skiing, this will be a breeze. And trust me, it's easier to go down than to go back up."

I groaned. Not only did I have to make it down this hill in one piece, but I had to ski back up it too? Life's not fair. Maybe I can take my skis off and walk the rest of the way. I took off one ski and experimentally stuck my foot in the snow. My foot fell in and the snow was up to my knee. I guess I won't be walking.

_Nessie POV_

Somehow, Rachelle and I managed to get together and ski next to each other without someone separated. I think it was because our cabins were skiing near each other and I was at the back of my line while she was at the front of hers. I really didn't care how it happened though.

When we got to the hill, we didn't really know how to get down it. Even though I was half vampire, I didn't think I could ski down without falling. Despite living in the mountains, I'd never gone skiing before.

We tried to ski down, but we weren't really getting anywhere. So, I decided to try something different. I sat down on my butt, making sure I was off my skis so I wouldn't start sliding down the hill uncontrollably.

"What are you doing?" Rachelle asked.

"Don't judge me. Lots of people are doing it," I said, somewhat defensively.

"I can see that, but I don't know what they're doing either."

"Oh. Well, I can't say I'm 100% certain about what they're doing, but I'm trying to slide down on my butt so I don't surt myself."

"Good idea." She sat down a couple feet away from me.

We slowly started to inch our way down the hill, with people passing us on both sides. I hoped that nobody would try to go between us. Suddenly, I heard screaming. I looked up just as my mother went whizzing between Rachelle and I on her butt, nearly running us both over in the process. I think she'd tried to do the same thing as us, but forgot to make sure she wasn't still standing on her skis as she crouched down.

We watched as she gained speed. When she got to the bottom of the hill, she crashed into a tree.

I burst out laughing - I knew she wasn't hurt. I was actually more concerned about the tree, and very surprised that it hadnt been knocked over.

"Well," I said, after I managed to stop laughing, "I guess we should learn from her mistakes and not do that."

"Good idea."

We continued down the hill and met with my mother at the bottom. I was surprised that nobody had helped her up. I swear, she must be the most uncoordinated vampire ever. If vampires could have two special abilities, that would be her second one.

"Are you okay?" I asked as I pulled her up. I knew she's be fine, but most humans wouldn't be after that.

"Ow."

I laughed. "Good answer."

She grinned and said, "I think I'll be okay. After all, I've been through worse."

"Such as?"

"Wrestling with Emmett."

"Good point. After that, you could live through anything," I smiled wryly at my choice of words.

We continued to ski, and luckily the rest of the trip was fairly uneventful. It was dark when we got back to the camp, she we had to have our snack and then go to bed.

_Edward POV_

Before we all went to bed (well, most of us), we had a snack. In case you care, hot chocolate is one of the most disgusting human foods ever. Especially when they put those white gooey things, marshmallows, I believe, in the drink. Ew. But, according to the humans' thoughts, it tasted good and the warmth of the drink was nice, so who am I to complain? I didn't have to drink it.

Since I wasn't drinking any hot chocolate or eating any cookies, I let my mind wander. I thought back to the last time I was here, and how Elizabeth had just died. I was feeling preffy bad then . . . and to make it worse, when we got home, Esme offered to buy me a new piano. Of course, I declined - someone like Elizabeth can't just be replaced. I tried to explain this to Esme by asking her if she could replace Carlisle that way if he died, but she said it wasn't the same thing. I saw no difference (other than the fact that Elizabeth wasn't my wife - I learned that lesson the first time).

I thought back to Elizabeth's last moments, and a pang of sadness hit me as I remembered how I killed her. That still haunts me - sometimes I think I see her ghost wandering around. Don't tell anyone that.

I realized that I couldn't let myself think about that, or I'd get depressed again. I decided to remember happy times, like when I took her trick-or-treating after Alice helped me dress her like a keyboard. Oh, good times.

While I was remincising, Jasper cane over and asked, "Are you okay? Your emotions are all over the place."

"I'm fine," I reassured him. "I was just thinking about Elizabeth."

"Oh." Jasper sounded like he felt awkward. "You know, it's been a long time since that happened. Have you considered therapy?"

"Jasper, have you ever lost a loved one?" I asked.

"Not exactly. I've had friends die, though. Well, I don't even know if I can consider them friends . . . maybe acquaintences."

"Then you wouldn't understand," I said.

"Edward, Elizabeth was a piano. Having a piano break is a little different than losing a loved one. That's like the RMS Olympic saying that its sister died when the Titanic sank . . . it's not the same thing."

"Don't be racist," I said. "Just because she was a piano, it doesn't mean that I can't love her."

"For God's sake, Edward," Jasper said, exasperated, "It was just a giant hunk of wood!"

I was offended. "How dare you say such things about Elizabeth? You take that back!"

"Make me." When I didn't do anything, he continued. "It's true, though! You're all sad about a big, old hunk of wood . . . with a few other things thrown in there. Things like wood cannot have feelings!"

"You don't understand," I stated.

"You're right. I don't."

**Review please :) I'll do my best to update soon. And if anyone has ideas for Jake and Rose's prank, feel free to make suggestions :)**


	7. Chapter 7

**Kso, sorry it kinda took a couple weeks . . . i was a little busy :P But here's the next chapter (obviously :P) and I hope you enjoy it :)**

_Bella POV_

Well, don't I feel retarded now. I only made a fool of myself in front of the entire camp. No biggie. You'd think I'd be used to it by now, since I've pretty much been embarassing myself since before I was born (yes, it's possible, no, I don't want to get into it). Like the time I got knocked out playing volleyball, or when I knocked down the scenery during the school production of _The Wizard of Oz._ At least the scenery was a house and it fell on the Wicked Witch of the East. . .

When we got back to our cabin after snack time, all the kids in my cabin were saying how what I did was 'the awesomest thing they'd ever seen.' I was trying to change the subject when there was a knock at the door.

"Knock, knock," called Alice's voice.

"Nobody's home!" I yelled. I didn't particularily want to deal with Alice at the time.

Of course, being Alice, she came in anyway. Cindy gave her the evil eye, but she wasn't fazed. Anyone who can survive a Look from Esme can survive a Look from anybody.

"So," Alice said, grinning, "How much are you willing to pay so that I don't post that video on YouTube?"

"What video?" I was confused. The only video I could think of was the truth or dare one, and that one embarassed her just as much as it embarassed me. If not more.

"The one I took about half an hour ago," she said casually.

Then it clicked. She'd taken a video of my skiing incident. That little-

"So, what's it gonna be?" she asked cheerfully.

"If you post it, I'll tell Esme about that time you-"

"Oh, she already knows. Rosalie told her last month," Alice said, cutting me off.

"Well, darn. I have nothing, then."

"Good," Alice grinned. "So, if you let me play Bella Barbie with you for a year, I won't post that video."

"Six months," I agrued.

"You wanna make it two years?" she threatened, clearly enjoying herself.

"I didn't know pixies could be so evil," I commented. "I always thought they were nice, friendly creature."

"You learn something new every day," Alice quipped. "So, two years then?"

"I thought it was one," I protested.

"Okay, we'll compromise. One and a half."

"That doesn't make any sense," I told her. And it really didn't. I mean, she says a year, I say less, she says more, and she chooses an amount between her two original options? Some compromise.

"Sure it does."

"Whatever." I wasn't gonna argue with her. Who knows, that might bring it up to three years. "You know, it might be less painful for me to just let you post the video."

"That's possible," Alice agreed.

I sighed. "Fine, a year and a half. But if I change my mind and say that you can post the video, then that stops immediately."

"Deal," Alice said happily, and left.

I can't believe it. That girl will do anything to get what she wants. And even when she loses, she wins. It's not fair.

_Rosalie POV_

I was still trying to come up with prank ideas. Jacob and I had decided to do the 'mud in the sleeping bag' idea, but we still needed something else.

I was sitting in my cabin when it came to me. I jumped up and ran out of my cabin, straight to his cabin. I burst in without bothering to knock and said, "I have the perfect idea!"

"For the prank?" Jacob asked excitedly.

"Yup," I said.

"Ok, so what it it?"

"Ok. We have to replace her conditioner with hair removal cream."

"That is the best prank ever! I never thought I'd say this, but I'm impressed, Blondie. But, won't her hair never grow back, since she's a leech and all?"

"It will," I lied. "It will just take a little longer than it would for a human."

"Oh, ok. Let's do it then. Do you have any hair removal cream?"

"Emmett does."

"Why?"

"Don't ask," I said.

"Alrighty then," Jacob said, not pushing the issue. Smart mutt. "So, when are we gonna do this thing?"

"I was thinking tomorrow, cause we have to wait till the cabin's empty, and I'm fairly certain that won't be happening again tonight."

"That makes sense," Jacob agreed.

"Of course it does."

"Don't be too cocky yet, Blondie. It still has to work, you know."

"It will."

"If you say so," Jacob said.

"What, are you planning to sabotage it or something?" I asked.

"Nope. Just don't forget about karma."

"What are you talking about?"

"I don't really know where I was going with that," he admitted.

"Neither do I."

**Please review...I was so sad when I hardly got any reviews last time :(**


	8. Chapter 8

**Okay, so I've updated again :) First of all, I just wanted to say Happy Holidays to everyone in case I don't get a chance to update before they're over. And enjoy the chapter :)**

_Rosalie POV_

When everyone got up in the morning, they all went to the Polar Dive. It was similar to the Polar Bear Swim that is done in the summer, expect the get in their bathing suits and just jump in the snow. Doesn't seem very safe to me. So, anyway, I took the opportunity to get Jacob and go to Alice's cabin to replace her conditioner with hair removal cream. The only bottle I could find only had about a quarter of it left, but I figured it would do. Then, we went to breakfast with our cabins.

Breakfast was waffles. They were all hard, but I guess it didn't really matter since I don't like human food either way. After I managed to choke it down, I checked the schedule. I was delighted to find that both Alice's cabin and my cabin had showers during cabin time.

After brushing our teeth, we went to the shower house. When we got there, we had to wait for the water to get hot. I was actually the one who figured that out by stepping into the shower and finding the water cold. All my campers laughed at me, but it actually felt warm on my cold skin. So, the joke's on them.

Alice's cabin came in soon after mine. They were waiting in line for the showers when Natalie asked Alice if she could borrow some conditioner. Alice gave her the quarter full bottle and told her that she could keep it because she had another one. The one she gave away was the same one that I filled with the hair removal cream. Shit.

_Alice POV_

I had just lent Natalie my conditioner when I had a vision. In the vision, Natalie was coming out of the shower (don't worry, she had a towel on) and she was bald.

"What the hell?" I said aloud.

"What's wrong?" Rosalie, who was nearby, asked.

"I just had a vision of Natalie coming out of the shower bald," I told her, still slightly dumbfounded.

"Well, that's strange."

"Yeah," I agreed. "I wonder what happened. Maybe she was allergic to my conditioner or something."

"Maybe," Rosalie agreed. She lookd kinda guilty about something. All of a sudden, it clicked. Rosalie must have done something. I thought of her future disappearing the same way it had last time she tried to do something to me and how I'd accidentally poured juice on her.

"What did you do?" I asked.

"Nothing . . ."

"No, seriously. What did you do?"

"Well," she said. "I switched your conditioner with hair removal cream as revenge for when you got juice on me and then you gave it to Natalie and-"

"What?" I screamed, cutting her off. "You put hair removal cream in conditioner? You know that wouldn't have grown back, right?"

"Yeah, well, I wasn't thinking about that at the time."

"Oh, really?" I asked. "Because I seem to remember you telling Emmett that his hair wouldn't grow back when he used it. Well, actually you told him after he used it . . ."

"Yeah, that made things kinda boring for a while."

Ew. I really did not need that mental picture. "Rose, remember our agreement to not talk about those kinds of things?"

"Sorry, I wasn't thinking," she said.

"You're been doing that a lot lately," I commented. "It must be the blond in you."

"Oh, shut up."

I was about to make a sarcastic remark that would make my parents faint if they were to hear it when Natalie came out of the shower. Like I saw in my vision, she was bald, but she hadn't appeared to notice. Well, I wasn't gonna be the one to tell her. She'd already be blaming me since it was my conditioner that did it to her.

Everyone was laughing at her but nobody said anything. Honestly, I didn't think she even knew that they were laughing at her. I mean, come on, kids laugh at everything these days.

Then, she looked in the mirror and the room grew silent for a second. Then, all that could be heard was her high pitched scream. This was going to be fun to explain.

_Jasper POV_

Emmett and I were sitting outside by the kids, who were buliding a snow fort when we heard an extrememly loud scream.

"That was loud," I commented. I knew I was pointing out the obvious, but with Emmett, sometimes you have to.

"Indweed it was," he said.

"Did you just say 'indweed'?" I asked.

"Indweed I did."

"Well, what is 'indweed' anyway?"

"It's my new word," Emmett explained.

"Strange. Where did you hear it?"

"I made it up. I thought it sounded cooler than indeed."

"Okay, that's not weird . . ." I said sarcastically.

"Oh, good, I'm glad you agree."

"Emmett . . ." I started, then said, "You know what? Just nevermind. Have fun with your new word."

"I will," he said, and bounded off to make a snow fort.

**Please review :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**So, another chapter. I don't own Twilight, I think I forgot to say that in the last few chapters :P I hope you all had a great holdiay season and that you'll all have a happy new year. Enjoy :)**

_Alice POV_

When Natalie got over the shock of seeing herself bald, she stormed up to me and asked, "What the hell did you put in this conditioner?"

Hmm. Now, I could tell he what it was and take the blame for her baldness. Or, I could tell her that it was Rosalie. Of course, then Rosalie would try to take revenge on me again, but Jasper did promise to protect me. What to do, what to do?

"Ask Rosalie?" I told her.

"I should have known that this was her fault," Natalie muttered, the turned to Rosalie, waiting for an explanation.

"Why would you think it was me?" Rosalie asked.

"Because you hate me. And it seems like something you would do."

"You don't even know me!" Rosalie exclaimed.

"We were co-counselors last year," Natalie pointed out.

Rosalie didn't seem to have anything to say to that, which appeared to surprise Natalie. Honestly, I was surprised, too. Very few people can make Rosalie speechless, even momentarily.

"So, what was it?" Natalie pushed.

"Hair removal cream."

And with that, Natalie did something that even I didn't see coming. She punched Rosalie in the face.

_Rosalie POV_

What the hell just happened? Did she seriously just try to punch me? And I emphasize the word try. I barely felt that.

"Alice? Was that a punch?" I asked, just to verify it?

"Yeah."

Natalie was standing there, holding her hand. "That really hurt," she commented.

"Really? I barely felt it."

Natalie looked like she was going to make some sort of sarcastic remark when Erika walked in. My guess was that one of the campers had told her what was going on and she had come to stop the fight.

"What's going on?" she asked.

"Nothing," the three of us chorused.

Erika looked at us suspiciously and then said, "Can I talk to you?"

We followed her out, not wanting to make a scene. As we were walking, I asked Alice, too low for humans to hear, "Why are you coming? You didn't do anything."

"I know. I just don't wanna miss this."

I laughed. Even on the verge of being in trouble, Alice was still nosey.

When we reached Erika's office, we sat down. "So," she asked. "What was that all about?"

Nobody answered.

Erika rolled her eyes. "Very mature. Since none of you wants to explain the situation, you can just each tell me how you were involved."

Alice spoke up first, "I let Natalie use my conditioner."

"That's it?" Erika asked.

"Yup."

I decided to go next. "I put hair removal cream in Alice's conditioner, thinking that she would be the one to use it."

"Why would you do that?"

"It was just a prank. We always play pranks on each other."

Erika turned to Rosalie and asked, "Is this true?"

"Yeah, but they're not usually that harsh. Usually we just steal each others clothes while we're in the shower or something."

"I see." Erika didn't seem impressed. Then again, what adult would? "Natalie?"

"I used the conditioner. Then, when I found out what Rosalie had done, I punched her in the face."

"Any do you think that was appropriate?"

"Well, no, not really, but it seemed like a good idea at the time."

"That's what people say when they've committed a crime whie drunk," I pointed out.

My comment was ignored, and Erika said, "Well, if you were campers, I'd have to call your parents, but since you're not, I think I'll just let you off with a warning. But, do anything like that again, and you're gone. Understood?"  
"Yes ma'am."

_Emmett POV_

When I saw Rosalie at our second block of cabin time, she looked really ticked off.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked.

"I got punched in the face."

"By who?"

"Natalie."

After I finished laughing, I said, "You got punched in the face by a human?"

"No shit, Sherlock."

"Is that why Jasper and I heard that really loud scream?"

"Probably. That wasn't me, though. That was Natalie," she explained.

"Why?"

"I put hair removal cream in Alice's conditioner as a joke and she borrowed it."

"That's where my hair removal cream went!" I exclaimed. "I was gonna use that last night."

"Oh, God, Emmett. Didn't I tell you not to use that again?"

"Well . . ."

"Just don't. You know, I was gonna give that back to you, but I think I've changed my mind."

"Oh, so you want to use it!"

"No. Just nevermind."

**Review please :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Yeah, I know it's been a long time, but I was busy with exams and stuff. I also had a mild case of writer's block. So, I don't own Twilight, please enjoy. :) **

_Nessie POV_

After cabin time, which my cabin mates and I had spent cleaning our cabin, we had to go to our cabin activities. My cabin's activity was skiing, and so was Rachelle's. What a coincidence. I decided that we could use this time to plan a prank against Katie. She wasn't going to be skiing with us today (I'm not sure why cause we're in the same cabin) but she would be doing our next activity with us. That was when we had to build a snowfort, and then we would have a snowball fight at the end of the week. I'm surprised that Erika's letting me do this, but I'm not complaining. I think it's gonna be really great, especially since Canada has way more snow than we do back in the U.S.

We met up when our cabins began. I asked, "So, what are we gonna do to Katie?"

"We could put a razor blade inside a snowball."

"That's a little extreme."

"Says the girl who broke a bunkbed last year and almost killed her."

"You have no proof that I did that!" I protested.

Rachelle laughed. "Yeah, ok. Well, we could put something else in the snowballs then, like maple syrup."

"That would be good. It's not dangerous, but it is really sticky."

"Okay, then. Let's do it."

"Okay, cool," I agreed.

We set to work on learning to ski. Downhill skiing was different than cross-country skiing, and all cabins were required to learn it in case they had kids who were taking the downhill skiing elective. There was a mountain (kind of) at the edge of the island, and the downhill skiers would be taking a trip there at the end of the week. Maybe I could push Katie off a skilift at some point . . . nah, that would look too much like attempted murder.

We started by skiing down the hill that Momma fell down last night. It was definately easier on downhill skis. Unfortunately, by the time we'd gone down the hill a few times, we had to go back and make our way to our next cabin activity.

We headed to out next activity, and against all odds, Rachelle and I were on the same team, and Katie wasn't. That's obviously a great thing, cause it would look really bad if we were to shoot snow balls at our own teammates. We started to build our fort, and by the time the time ended, we were well on our way to making a great fort.

_Emmett POV_

My cabin's first activity was skating. I don't know why the John Island people didn't tell us to bring skates if we were gonna be skating, but they didn't. So, now, because of my ginormusly large feet, the only skates they had in my size were figure skates. When you think about it, that doesn't really make sense, since figure skating is definately a girls' sport.

But, anyway, if I'm gonna wear figure skates, I'd better have a tutu too. I bet Rosalie has one that I can borrow. I guess I'd better go find her.

"Rosalie!" I yelled when I found her.

"Yeah?"

"Do you have a tutu?"

"Yeah," she replied. "Why?"

"I need to borrow it."

"Why?"

"Well, you see," I explained, "My cabin has skating time, but all they have left in my size was figure skates. And you can't wear figure skates without a tutu."

"Yes, you can."

"No, I can't. I am not skating without a tutu."

"If you wear a tutu on that ice, you will regret it," Rosalie warned.

"No, I won't. What could you possibly do to me that would be worse than not wearing a tutu?" I asked.

"Oh, it's not what I will do, it's what I won't do. For at least two weeks."

"Oh . . ." I said. This was a dilemma . .. both causes were equally important. Finally, one won over the other. "I want the tutu."

"Your loss," Rosalie commented as she tossed me the tutu.

"Trust me, it's worth it."

"You won't think that in two hours," Rosalie said, then shut the door behind me as I left.

I made my way back to the ice rink after putting on the tutu. Hopefullu this would give me super magical skating powers, so I can do a triple lutz like the people on TV do.

It's really easy to do. You just have to skate backwards really fast, and then stick your foot out behind you so it hits the ice. Then you go flying in the air, and spin around a lot until you land on one foot. It should be a piece of cake.

I started to skate backwards really fast. I stuck my foot out and put it in the ice, just like the people on TV do. I went flying, so it must have been working. But then, something went wrong when I hit a tree - maybe it was doing a lutz too. I think if I was human, it would have killed me. But, it didn't, so I simply got up and walked away.

**Ok, so please review. I'll update ASAP, but I'm going to France tomorrow and may not get many chances to update. But please review, it will honestly make my day :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey everyone . . . sorry it's been so long. I've been in France, and just lost track of time. Someone reviewed the other day, and that made me remember to right the next chapter. So if I ever take this long again, someone please kick me. Or just send me a message to remind me. :P And now Fanfiction is being stupid and telling me there's an error anytime I try to edit a story, so I dunno how long that will last. But even in France, I do not own Twilight, and I hope you all enjoy the chapter. I also hope I will be able to write a better one and put it up fairly soon.**

_Emmett POV_

Everyone came chasing after me as I ran, wanting to make sure I was ok. Why wouldn't I be? They should be asking if the tree is ok. My head hit it, and I have a really thick skull. Lucky for me, I happen to be an extremely intelligent being, so I didn't tell them that.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said.

"But I'm not," I pointed out. They can't argue with that, even though it's technically not true.

"Maybe you should go see the nurse. You might have a concussion or something."

"That's ok, I have a very thick skull," I told them. I figured it would be safe to tell them that because humans can have very thick skulls too. Bella told me that about Mike Newton one time . . . that's kind of insulting, actually.

"Seriously . . ."

"Oh my lanta! I'm okay!" I exclaimed.

There was a moment of silence, then someone asked, "Oh my lanta?"

Rosalie, probably having heard the commotion, came back just then and said, "You don't wanna know. Trust me."

"Do you know what it means?" someone asked.

"No, but if it came out of Emmett's mouth, nobody wants to know. Anyone remember the monkey incident from last year?"

"That's stereotyping, Rose. Not cool," I said.

"Too bad. Now come on, I need your help with something," she said, and pulled me away from everyone.

Hmmm . . . this sounds interesting . . . I think I know what she's getting at here. I know she said nothing for two weeks, but I didn't really think she'd be able to hold off for that long. Of course, I didn't expect it to be this quick either, but I guess I'm just that irrestible. She led me to her cabin, which I was pleased to see was empty. I followed her in and took off my shirt.

She turned aroud and started to say something, but stopped when she saw me and asked, "What are you doing?"

I was shocked. "What do you think I'm doing?"

"I don't know," she replied, sounding puzzled. "That's why I asked. Why are you shirtless in my cabin?"

"Why aren't you shirtless in your cabin?" I asked. That's right, Rosalie. That logic works both ways. It's only logical for that to be so.

Then, it must have clicked. Man, she can be so slow sometimes. "I already told you, Emmett. Two weeks."

Well, I guess I have to give her credit. I never thought she'd actually go through with it. I guess I should have figured it our for a couple reasons. One would be past experiences. Another would be that things like this happen to me a lot when I agree to things without thinking about them. Which I also do a lot.

"Right . . . so what did you need me for then?"

"I need you to help me get revenge on Natalie."

"Natalie? You mean your co-counselor from last year? What did she ever do to you?" I asked.

"She punched me in the face, remember?"

"Yeah, but she's just human. It's not like she hurt you or anything. And don't you think baldness is a bad enough punishment?"

"No."

"But you think some types of baldness are bad . . . like when I used the hair removal cream-"

"What are you getting at, Emmett?" she asked, cutting me off.

"I don't really know."

"Besides, don't you know me? The backfiring of someone's attempt to hurt me is never enough of a punishment. I always get even. Remember when Alice got mad at me and hid all my car parts on me back in '83?"

"Right . . . you ripped her arm off and wouldn't give it back for a week," I remembered.

"Exactly. And that reminds me. I need to get back at Alice . . . the hair removal cream didn't exactly work out . . . Forget Natalie. We're planning revenge on Alice again. So, will you help me?"

"No."

Rosalie looked shocked, probably because I was actually brave enough to tell her I wouldn't help her. I'm stronger than her, though, so I have nothing to worry about. Come to think of it, I'm smarter than her too, but nobody would believe me if I said it, so I may as well not.

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to. Go ask Jacob to help you. You'll need him to stay off of Alice's radar anyway."

"He's already helping me," she said. "We need more ideas though, and yours are always the best. And the funniest."

"Well, sorry."

"I thought you'd do anything for me," she begged, giving me puppy dog eyes.

"Normally, I would, but if you won't give me what I want, why should I give you what you want?"

"What are you talking about?" she asked, sounding irritated. "Wait. This isn't about the two weeks thing, is it?"

"No . . . maybe . . ."

"You are so immature, Emmett," Rosalie said with a huff, then stomped off.

"Says the 80 year old girl who just stomped away," I muttered.

"I heard that!"

Whatever. I've learned that sometimes it is better to ignore certain people. Unfortunately, I learned that the hard way, when my family decided to try out that tactic on me. That was the same day that I learned that you shouldn't use a telephone wire as a tightrope. It was an educational day.

**Please review :) It will make me happier than when I didn't fail my French science test :D And I will bring you a souvenir from France if you do :P**


	12. Chapter 12

**As always, sorry for the delay and thanks to those who reminded me to update :) This one's slightly longer (i think) and better (i think). Enjoy :) P.S. Twilight is still not mine :(**

_Bella POV_

So, Alice blackmailed me into playing Bella Barbie for a year and a half. Now I need to figure out what I can do to get out of it. The most obvious course of action would be to blackmail her back, and then our two blackmails would cancel each other out. But Alice isn't easy to blackmail, and I don't think I'm sneaky enough to do it.

I do, however, know a few people who are sneaky enough. There's Nessie, but I wouldn't want to encourage her. As much as I hate to admit it, there's Emmett, but he's Emmett. I don't want to get him involved. I could ask Jake, or maybe Jasper. If I can convince Jasper to help me, that would be the best, cause he's probably got some good dirt on her.

I went to look for Jasper and finally found him sitting under a tree reading (yes, in the snow) while the kids in his cabin made snowmen. I think they were having a contest.

"Jasper?" I asked hesitantly, walking up to him.

"Yeah?" he looked slightly surprised to see me.

"Would you be willing to help me with something?"

"Depends on what it is," he replied, setting his book down.

And here's the scary part . . . "Well, actually, I need blackmail against Alice."

He didn't look surprised. "Why?"

"Because she has blackmail against me, and I need to even it out," I explained.

"Let me guess. You have to play Bella Barbie for a certain amount of time, or she'll tell your secret."

I was a little shocked. "How'd you know?"

"If you ever tell anyone this, I will cheerfully beat you to death, but she does the same thing to me. When we disappear into our room for hours on end, we're not doing what y'all think we're doing."

I couldn't help it. I burst out laughing. "Are you serious?"

"Unfortunately."

"Wait . . . are you saying that you'll help me?"

"Yeah. You just made me realize that I seriously need to help myself, so I figured I'd help you while I'm doing so," he told me.

"Um, thanks?"

"No problem."

"So, then, what do you know about Alice?" I asked. Might as well get to it before he changes his mind.

"I know her deepest, darkest secret."

"What is it?" I asked eagerly.

He leaned over and whispered it in my ear.

"No way!"

"Yes way."

_Nessie POV_

Rachelle and I were working on our snow fort when she asked me, "What are your teachers like?"

"What?" I asked, slightly confused.

"What are your teachers like?" she repeated.

"Like at school?"

"Yeah."

"I dunno . . . they're just teachers. Why are we talking about teachers and school during March break?" I asked.

"I was just wondering. All of my teachers are weird, and I was wondering if that was normal."

"Weird how?"

"Well I have this one teacher who, like, never talks to me but stares at me all the time."

"Maybe he likes you," I teased.

"She."

There was an awkward pause. Then I said, "Oh. Well, is she cute?"

"Um . . . I don't think I should answer that."

"You're probably right," I agreed. "Anyway, enough talk about school. We still need to think of more pranks."

"Good point."

We worked in silence for a while, trying to come up with something. It's hard to be a mastermind all the time, you know. I thought of all sorts of things, but most of them weren't doable. I mean, it would have been kinda hard to burn her house down, especially since we don't know where she lives. And it would be hard to throw her clothes in the lake, since it's frozen over. We could throw them in the snow though . . .

"We could make an army of snowmen and dress them all in her clothes," Rachelle suggested.

"And we'd have to make all the snowmen really fat," I giggled.

"Good idea! Should we do it tonight?"

"Maybe . . . if the snow is still sticky. And besides, we'll have to steal all her clothes and sneak out, which could be tricky."

"Yeah, but we're ninjas. We can handle it."

_Jasper POV_

I cannot believe I just did that. I just told Bella Alice's deepest, darkest secret. She's going to kill me. And if I survive, she'll probably scream at me for hours before killing me again. And all this for what? All this to avoid being her Barbie. Well, I guess her Ken would be more accurate, but same idea. I am so stupid.

Of course, maybe it will work out for me. I mean, Alice really doesn't want anyone to know her secret, so maybe if I start threatening to tell it, she'll stop dressing me up. Oh, who am I kidding? Alice always wins. ALWAYS. She'll find a way. Why the hell didn't I think of this before.

Oh shit, here she comes. I wonder if she knows what I did.

"Hey Jazz! What's up?" she asked.

Play it cool. "Not much, really. Just reading," I said, holding out the book that I'd quickly picked back up when I saw her coming.

"Upside down?"

I looked and saw the book was, indeed, upside down. "I got bored reading it right-side-up." Brilliant, Jasper. Just brilliant.

"I see . . ."

"You don't believe me?" I asked, trying to stay calm but freaking out inside.

"You seem nervous," she observed. "And nervousness often symbolizes lying."

"Jeez, who are you, my guidance counselor?"

"No, I'm just saying . . ."

"Did you have a vision or something?" I asked, still trying to stay calm. I mean really, I can face down an entire army of men, and then an even bigger army of vampires, and I'm afraid of this pixie who's half the size of me? That doesn't even make sense.

"No, you're just acting weird."

"It must be everyone emotions getting to me."

"Yeah, I'm sure that's it," Alice said, but she didn't sound convinced.

Shit. I'm in trouble.

**Review please? It will make me happy :)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Hello again everyone :) First of all, I'd like to say sorry for not updating in like 3 months. I don't really have any excuses, I guess I was just lazy :P If anyone is still reading this, I probably don't deserve that. Second of all, I'd like to thank D-Gray gal for reminding me to get off my butt and write this again, and third of all, enjoy :) P.S. I still don't own Twilight.**

_Bella POV_

Yay, yay, yay! I'm so happy! I finally have something to blackmail Alice with, and it's way worse than a video of me falling while skiing. And the best part is that I can use it as blackmail against her in other situations too. Not that I'd do that to be mean, of course, but just for self defense. I should go find her and tell her.

I found her supervising her cabin's activity.

"Hey, Alice," I said gleefully.

"Yes, Bella?" she replied, not looking up from what she was doing.

"Guess what?"

"What?"

"You're supposed to guess," I told her.

"I don't know."

"No, you have to guess!"

She finally looked up, looking slightly annoyed. "I don't know!"

"Guess!" I insisted.

"Edward's been crying over Elizabeth again."

What? He better not have been. We had a talk about this last year. If he's been crying again, I'm going to be really ticked off. I don't think he even cried when he thought I died, twice. Sure, he considered suicide, but he didn't cry.

"Has he really?" I asked.

"I don't know. That was my guess," Alice explained, sounding exasperated.

"Oh," I said, feeling a little stupid. "No, that's not it."

"Well I'm not guessing again, so you're just gonna have to tell me."

"I know your secret."

She froze. "What secret?"

"Oh, you know which one."

"Not the one about . . ." she trailed off, not wanting to say it.

"Oh yes," I said ominously, assuming that we were talking about the same thing.

"Who the hell told you that?" she demanded.

I paused for about a millisecond to think about it. I didn't want to rat Jasper out, but I wasn't about to lie to her and say that someone else told me. Then that would just give that person a reason to be mad at me, and why would I want that? I was actually tempted to say that it was Rosalie, but I know I'd pay for that in the future. Oh, what the hell? You only live once.

"Rosalie."

Alice stared at me for a minute, then said, "You're lying."

Now, two years ago, I might have asked her how she knew that, or denied it. Now, I just asked, "Why do you say that?"

"Because Rosalie doesn't know about that secret."

"How do you know? Maybe she does."

"No, she doesn't, because she would have used it against me a long time ago."

"Good point," I said.

"So, who told you? Or do you even know? How do I know you're not bluffing?"

I ignored the bluffing part, because we both knew that I wasn't bluffing. I'm not that good of a liar, even if I have improved. "A little birdie told me."

"And was that little birdie's name Jasper?"

"Due to the fact that the little birdie in question hasn't signed any release forms, his or her name shall remain unspoken. But besides, Jasper would be a big birdie."

"Why?" Alice asked, momentarily confused.

"Well, compared to you."

"Shut up. You know what, I bet it was him. He's the only one who knows, well, other than Carlisle and Esme, but they wouldn't do that to me. So it must have been him. He is in so much trouble."

She stalked off, I assumed it was to go find him.

Sorry Jasper, I tried.

_Rosalie POV_

Jacob and I managed to sneak out of lunch and meet in the bush to discuss our prank on Alice. After all, we only had one week of March Break to get it done. I don't know how he got out, but I simply told my co-counsellor and campers that I was going to the bathroom.

"So," I asked. "Any ideas?"

"No, not really. I asked the kids in my cabin, but their ideas were either bad, or wouldn't really work on vampires."

"What wouldn't work on a vampire?" I asked, curious.

"Things like drawing on her face while she's asleep, or putting mud in her sleeping bag."

"Oh, I see what you mean."

We sat there in silence for a few minutes, both of us thinking, until I said, "You know, we could still do the mud in the sleeping bag thing. I know she won't be sleeping in it, but she'll still have to get in it and lay there until everyone else in the cabin falls asleep."

"Good point. Let's do it then."

"Right now?"

"Sure, why not? There's nobody around, and we have time."

"Yeah, but the people in our cabin are probably expecting us to be back sometime before lunch ends," I pointed out.

"Oh yeah."

"Well," I said, "I could just say that I was having girl problems if they ask."

"What about me?" Jacob asked. "I can't have girl problems."

I snickered, and said, "Just tell them you took a dump as thick as their necks."

"Good idea. Where'd you-"

"Emmett."

"Ah, I see," he said, and wisely didn't say anything else.

We didn't say much else after that. We left our meeting place and headed to Alice's cabin. Luckily, it was near the beach, so, even though it wasn't real mud, we could take the wet sand from the beach or the bottom of the lake and put it in. I grabbed a bucket that was laying on the beach and started to fill it up with mud while Jacob went to retrieve Alice's sleeping bag.

When he brought it back, I said, "Good dog. Now, drop it."

"Screw you, Blondie."

We went back to working in silence, both of us filling up the sleeping bag (I got rid of the bucket because it was taking too long). When we got to a certain point, I said, "We should stop now so that it doesn't look like there's mud in it. We still want it to look kind of flat."

"Good point," Jacob said, somewhat reluctantly.

We stopped and brought the sleeping bag back to Alice's cabin. We tried to put it back the same way it had looked before we'd taken it so that she wouldn't notice anything. Then we headed back to the dining hall.

When I sat back down at my table, I got weird looks from everyone in my cabin. My co-counsellor was tactful enough not to ask where I'd been, but the campers all wanted to know.

"Girl problems," I replied, hoping that they'd accept that as an answer. Of course, they didn't.

"What kind of girl problems?"

"None of your business."

They wouldn't stop asking though, so I finally said, "Ok, so, I have my period. And I'm sure you all know that when you have your period, you use a tampon. Well, I did so, and it got stuck, so I had to go to the nurse's office. And I'm sure you can all guess what happened from there on."

All the girls looked shocked, even my co-counsellor, who must have known that the story wasn't true. Just to make sure, I winked at her, and she stifled laughter. I think it's safe to say that my campers will mind their own business from now on.

_Jake POV_

When I got back to my table, all the boys wanted to know where I'd been. Normally, I wouldn't care about this, except they all thought that Rosalie and I had been busy, if you know what I mean. And that is just an absolutely disgusting thought. I don't even know if it's physically possible, with the whole vampire-werewolf thing.

Finally, I got fed up with their questions and suggestions and said, "Ok, look. I took a dump as thick as any of your necks, so it took a while. Leave me alone."

There was a moment of silence (well, just at my table, the rest of the dining hall was still loud) then someone said, "I don't believe you."

It turned out that none of them did, and they all wanted to know what I was really doing. They thought they knew, and wanted me to admit it, which of course, I didn't want to do. So, I gave in and told them the truth.

"Remember when I said that I wanted to prank a girl? Well, I had an idea, so that's what I went to do. Rosalie, the girl you saw me with, was helping out."

"What did you do?" they asked eagerly.

"Took a dump in her sleeping bag."

**Please review :) I promise I'll update sooner than last time ;)**


	14. Chapter 14

**Hello again :) So, for once I actually didn't take 2 months to update :P Twilight is owned by Stephenie Meyer...Enjoy :)**

_Jake POV_

"Really?"

"No, of course not. That would be disgusting."

"Then what did you do?"

"I told you," I said, exasperated, "I played a prank on someone I know."

"Yeah, we know, but what did you do to her?"

I sighed. "Put mud in her sleeping bag. Now, can you please leave me alone?"

_Edward POV_

After supper, which was absolutely revolting (even though the humans loved it), we were all told to go back to our cabins to put our snowsuits on, then meet in front of the dining hall by 7:30. Charlie and I took the kids back to our cabin and made sure they were all dressed. Once everyone was ready, we made our way to the dining hall.

When we got there, it was 7:30. All the cabins were there except Emmett's, but Caitlin (activities director) had long since learned to just ignore this.

"Good evening, everyone," she said. "Tonight's activity will be a winter Olympics. There will be seven different events, and the cabin who has the most points at the end will receive a prize. You get points by winning events. Each event will be worth a different amount of points; there will be two cabins at each event at a time, and each event will last 20 minutes. Before we start, each cabin will have to make a team banner. The banner must include the cabin's name, a logo and a slogan. When they are finished, we will all vote on the banners - no, you cannot vote for your own - and the winning banner will receive 10 points. Please make your way into the dining hall, and go to your table to make your banner. You have 10 minutes."

I ushered my kids into the dining hall and we got to work on our banner. After a minute of arguing, we decided who would do what, and we set to work. I was assigned the task of drawing the falcon, because nobody else wanted to do it. (They all swore that they couldn't draw well enough to do it, but they were actually just too lazy.) Others coloured the falcon, and some worked on the cabin name. We had a bit of trouble coming up with a slogan, but finally decided on 'The best of the best.' Not very creative, but it would do.

When the 10 minutes were up, Caitlin said, "Okay, counsellors, please bring your banner up to the front and hang it up."

I brought our banner to the front. As I was hanging our banner up, I got distracted by yelling. _We're gonna win, we're gonna win! We're gonna win cause you all suck! Suckers! _ It took me a minute to realize that it was just Emmett's thoughts. I shook my head and sat back down.

We looked at the banners, and then we all voted on which one we thought was best. Surprisingly, Emmett's won. Considering the fact that their slogan was 'We're awesome and you suck,' I'd figured that they'd lose. Emmett got up and high-fived the rest of his team, but in his head, he was thinking, _In your face, bitches. _Only Emmett.

Once someone had marked down the points, we all went back outside (the humans were hot in their snowsuits) and Caitlin explained how the rest of the night was going to work.

"Okay, so now that we've all got our banners, it's time to move on to the games. The seven activities will be: Skiing, Snowball Fight, Snowman Building Contest, Skating, Relay Race, Obstacle Course and Sliding Races. Each one will be run by a counsellor - counsellors, you'll have to look on the chart after to see if you're running one - and they will tell you more about your activity once you get there. They're not all as simple as their names suggest. The schedule is up on the wall in the dining hall, and counsellors will be responsible for checking where their team is supposed to be. You have five minutes to get to your first event. Go!"

I looked at the sheet and saw that I was running the Sliding Races, whatever that meant. I hoped somebody would be able to explain it to me. Or I could just read someone's mind.

_Bella POV_

I was put in charge of skiing. Of course they would put me in charge of the sport that I'm bad at. Not that I'm really good at any, but I did just crash into a tree while skiing.

When I got to the station, I found an instruction booklet that detailed what the kids had to do, along with two very big pairs of skis. Just as I finished reading the instructions, people showed up. The two cabins playing were Alice's cabin (led by Natalie) and Jake's cabin (led by Jake). When they were all ready, I explained what they'd have to do.

"This is what's gonna happen. Each cabin has a set of skis with enough footholds for all of you to use them - you're all going to be on the same pair of skis at the same time. Each team, counsellors included, must put the skis on, and you will all have to work as a team to finish the race first. I'd recommend choosing a foot to start with so you're all in sync. The course will take you along this trail down the hill, around the big rock twice and back here. The path is pretty straightforward, but there are orange flags to guide you. Any questions? Ok, go."

I followed the teams as they skied. It was the funniest thing I'd ever seen (way funnier than me falling down the hill and hitting a tree. Just sayin'). Natalie's team fell and rolled down the hill (which was pretty hard since they were all attached to the skis), while Jake's managed to stay upright. Then, Jake's crashed into the big rock - twice - and both teams fell backwards trying to get back up the big hill. Finally, they made it up, and it was very close, but Natalie's team won.

"And the winner is Fisher! You get 50 points."

**Review please :)**


	15. Chapter 15

**I don't own Twilight. Enjoy :)**

_Nessie POV_

For the first round, my cabin went to the snowball fight station. I'd been hoping that out of my two counsellors, Victoria would be the one to have to work a station, but I'd had no such luck. When we got to the station, Sophie told us what to do.

"Each team has a set of smocks to put over their snowsuits. One teams' will be white, the other teams' will be yellow. Each team will also have a set of snowballs, one being red and one being blue. You must throw your snowballs at the other team. A hit will only count if it hits a person's smock, because the dye in the snowballs will leave a mark, and we will be able to tell how many times the person has been hit. Whichever team hits more people will win. Each hit will be worth one point. You may not hit your own team mates, and if you do, your team will lose five points. Any questions?"

"What happens if you get it on your face? Or on your hair?" Katie asked.

"You'll have some extra colour for a few days," Sophie replied.

Katie looked shocked for a second, then got an evil glint in her eye. I'd bet all my money that she was planning to hit me. Not that she'd succeed, of course. I'm too fast for that.

Sophie was still answering questions when Victoria pulled me aside and said, "You're not doing this."

"Why not?" I asked, even though I had a pretty good idea.

"I don't trust you."

"But I haven't done anything wrong. You can't just ban me from it without a reason!" I exclaimed.

"Watch me."

I didn't know what I could say to make her let me play, but I did know someone who could help me. We were playing against Auntie Rose's team, so I figured she'd help me out.

"Rosalie!" I called.

Auntie Rose came over and asked, "What do you need?"

I pointed to Victoria and said, "She won't let me do the snowball fight!"

"Why?"

"She said she doesn't trust me, but I didn't even do anything," I whined.

Auntie Rose looked at me, then at Victoria, then back at me. Finally, she said, "Sorry, Ness, but this is your counsellor's decision, not mine. If she says you can't play, I can't change that." She turned and walked back to where her cabin was.

"Bitch," I muttered.

Auntie Rose turned, and I saw her eyes flash with anger. "You better not have been talking to me," she half growled.

"I was talking to both of you," I said, and went to sit down on a nearby log.

The snowball fight started. I got bored just sitting there and watching (and I was still ticked off about not being able to play) so I decided to get up and do something about it.

I got up and snuck up behind everyone on my team (my log was behind the fight) and picked up one of our snowballs. I threw it as hard as I could and hit Auntie Rose, who was not paying attention to me at all, right in the face. I'm actually surprised it worked, considering the fact that she is a vampire. She turned and glared at me, but didn't say anything to Victoria. I took this as a bad sign, meaning that she had a different - and probably worse - idea of how to get back at me.

As I picked up another snowball, Katie turned and saw me. She started to yell something to Victoria, so I hit her in the face with a snowball to shut her up. She threw one back, but missed. I stuck my tongue out, and picked up another snowball. Unfortunately, Victoria had seen her throw a snowball backwards, and turned around to see why. When she saw me, I hit her in the face with a snowball too. She looked furious, and I knew I was gonna be in trouble later, but it would be worth it to see her, Katie and Auntie Rose walk around with blue faces for a few days.

When the game was done (my team won with 67 points), I could see Victoria making her way over to me. Auntie Rose beat her to it though, and said, "What the hell was that?"

I didn't even try to play innocent like I usually do, and said, "You wouldn't help me, so why should I help you?"

"My face is gonna be blue for a week!"

"Sucks to be you," I said, smirking.

"You're gonna pay for this," she growled.

"I don't doubt it, but I'm sure I can handle whatever you have in mind," I said as she stalked away.

When she left, Victoria said, "I'm not even gonna bother getting mad at you anymore, because it's a waste of oxygen-"

"Kind of like you, eh?" I interrupted. I know it was rude, and wouldn't help my case at all, but I couldn't resist.

Victoria ignored my comment and continued, "And it's not worth it. So, when this is over, you're going to go to Erika's office, and she can get mad at you."

"Why not now?" I asked. Not that I wanted to go now, but I was curious.

"Because she's not there, and I don't trust you to sit there alone for two hours."

"Fair enough."

She left too, leaving me on the log. Katie walked by and said, "Bitch."

After a minute of sitting on the log, I realized that if I didn't want to be left behind, I'd better go to my next activity.

_Alice POV_

I looked at my phone and saw that it was 7:50, meaning that it was time for the cabins to move on to their next activities. I set them on their way, and waited for the next group to come in. It was Edward's cabin (led by Charlie) and Jasper's cabin (led by Jasper).

I explained the rules. "So, each person will have 15 minutes to build a snowman. You may use anything you can find in the bush, as well as any of the things we have for you here. Each snowman will get a score out of 5 and the team with the most points will win. Got it? Go!"

Everyone got to work building their snowmen. When the time was up, I told them to stop. I went around, judging each one. I chose to look at Edward's cabin first.

"Nice elephant," I said to a boy who had apparently made a snow-elephant instead of a snowman.

"It's a dog."

"Oh. Well, if it's a dog, I can give it 2.5 points. If it's an elephant, I can give it 3.5 points."

"It's an elephant."

I moved on to the next kid. He'd made a traditional snowman.

"How boring. 1 point," I said, and moved on. The kid looked a little insulted, but I didn't really care.

"That looks like my father when he's drunk," I commented on the next one.

"Alice, Carlisle's never been drunk," Jasper pointed out.

"Well, then that's what he'd look like if he was drunk. 5 points."

"Seriously?" asked the kid.

"Hell yeah! Do you know how much I'd pay to see my father drunk?"

I moved on without waiting for an answer. The next kid had made a snowman, which appeared to have suffered a bloody death. "That's morbid. 1 point."

The next snowman was really colourful. It wasn't very nice, but I do like colours, so I gave it 2.5 points. The others in Edward's cabin earned a 2.5, a 3, a 1, a 1.5, a 4, another 2.5 and a 3.5. My favourite was definitely the drunken Carlisle. Then I moved on to Jasper's cabin.

The first girl (yes, Jasper was in a cabin with girls) had made a cat. Normally, when I see cats, I just want to eat them, but this one was really cute. I gave it a 4.5.

The next one was definitely a vampire, which didn't bother me, but what freaked me out was that it looked like Edward.

"That looks like my brother," I said.

"Edward's your brother?"

"Yeah."

"Oh. Well, you see, this is what I was thinking. Edward is very hot, and vampires are really awesome, so I decided to combine them into one."

I breathed a (hopefully not visible) sigh of relief, because she wasn't on to us, and said, "Well, it's very well done, so normally, I'd give you a 5. But, since you think my brother is hot, I'm gonna have to make that a 4."

"That's not fair! Are you even allowed to do that?"

"Of course," I smiled. "I'm the judge."

I moved on to the next one. It was unidentifiable, so I walked by without pausing, and gave it a 1. When I got to the next one, the girl came up to me and said, "Do you like it, do you like it? It's you!"

I looked at it and said, "No. It makes me look fat. However, I'm flattered that you chose to sculpt me, so I'll give you a 3."

I finished judging, giving the other snowmen 2, 4, 1, 3.5, 1.5, 5, 2.5 and another 1. When I was done, I counted up the points and said, "The winner is Hawk Cabin with 33 points."

One of the boys in Edward's cabin asked, "How many points did we get?"

"30.5."

"Do we get to keep those points, even though we lost?"

"No. That's what losing means."

At that point, I looked at my phone and saw that it was time for them to move on. I sent them on their way and awaited the next group.

**Please review. I only got, like, 2 reviews last time and that made me very sad :( So, please? :D**


	16. Chapter 16

**Hey, all. So, I know it's been over a month, but for some reason, I thought I'd have more time to write once school started. Silly me. It's been sooo busy this year, and it's only been 2 weeks. I'll try to update more often though (yeah right, you've all heard that before). So I don't own Twilight or anything else in this story that isn't mine ;)**

_Emmett POV_

I had been running the skating event for two twenty minute periods (that's 30 minutes in total people - and they say I'm stupid!) when I realized that I wasn't wearing a tutu this time. Of course, that was unacceptable. After the second group left, I ran back to my cabin as fast as I could and found Rosalie's tutu under my bed. My hair removal cream was also there. It's a good thing she hasn't figured out my top secret hiding place yet, or I'd be in big trouble. I put the tutu on and ran back to the ice just as the next group arrived.

"Hey guys!"

They all just stared at me.

"Are you judging my tutu?"

Silence.

"You'd better not be judging my freaking tutu!" I screamed.

"Dude, don't worry, we're not judging your tutu," said Lucas, who was here with my cabin.

"Okay, good," I said, smoothing out the tutu. "So, I guess I have to explain the rules now. You have 15 minutes to come up with a one minute long routine. You can do whatever you want and use whatever you want. My instruction booklet says you need to be safe, but I don't care, I'll give you the points either way. And, you get extra points if you wear a tutu. Go!"

I sat and waited for the two teams to come up with their routines. It's really too bad that there aren't any Jasperflies at this time of year. It would give me someone to talk to while I was waiting. Maybe, they really are around, and they're just not talking to me because I accidentally killed one last year.

"Honest you guys, it was an accident!"

There was a moment of silence, and I realized that everyone was staring at me.

"Did I say that out loud?"

"Yeah..."

"Oh, sorry. Continue," I said, waving them on.

When the 15 minutes were up, I called one group off the ice to let the other perform their number. It started with all of them skating in a circle, then they would skate so that they looked like they were gonna crash, but they just went by each other. It was so cool! Then, they did some crosscuts and a fake fight thing. Basically, they just pretended to punch each other. It would have been a lot cooler if they actually had, because this was just so unrealistic. I clapped when they were done though, just to be nice.

Then the next group went. This cabin was girls, and I think maybe some of them were figure skaters, because their number was a lot better.

They did a whole bunch of jumpy and spinny things that I didn't know the names of. In the end, I decided that they were cooler, so they'd be the winners.

"And the girls win!" I announced.

Immediately, there were protests from the boys.

"Shut up, losers," I said. "The girls were better, so they won, and that's final."

They all gasped, and I said, "What?"

There was a moment of silence (thank God I didn't fart), then Lucas spoke up. "Um, it's kind of frowned upon to call the campers losers."

"Really? Why?"

"It's rude . . . and it's setting a bad example."

"But I'm already a bad influence. Bella tells me that all the time, ever since I taught Nessie what you should actually do with a banana."

Lucas looked horrified, and all the campers were trying not to giggle. I just stood there, confused. I mean, what's so funny about eating banana splits until you explode? Bella just didn't want Nessie eating all that sugar. It wasn't really that bad, was it?

Lucas said, "I don't even want to know," then led my cabin away. The other cabin followed, even though it wasn't time to switch yet. What did I do wrong?

_Jasper POV_

When the bell rang, announcing that it was time to switch stations, I looked at my schedule and saw that we'd be doing the relay race next. We would be against Jacob's cabin. Great. And they'd probably win because they were all guys, and I was stuck with stupid girls. Don't tell them I said that, they're vicious.

We went to the relay race section, which was a lot complicated than I'd originally thought it would be. We had to be in partners, and we first had to run to a garbage bag full of clothes, and one partner would dress the other (which was especially hard because it was winter and we all had snow suits on). Once the one person was dressed, we had to run to the next section, where the person who was dressed would sit on a chair, while the other person fed them pudding. The only catch was that the 'feeder' was blindfolded. Then, we both had to paint our faces to look like we were going to war (which really ticked me off, because there were no Confederate colours). Then, we'd run to the final table and pick up the lyrics to a prechosen song, which the entire group would have to sing.

Counsellors would only have to participate if the cabin had an uneven number of campers, and it was just my luck that my cabin did. Jacob's didn't, so he wouldn't have to do it.

I ended up being partners with a girl named Allie. We decided beforehand that she would dress me up, because 'it would be weird' the other way around. Unfortunately for me, that meant I also had to eat the pudding.

When it was our turn, we quickly ran to the first station. Since we were last, there was only one set of clothes left, which happened to be a pink dress and matching hat. I stood there, mortified, as Allie dressed me. Next, she put the blindfold on, and I sat on the chair. She then proceeded to feed me pudding, most of it getting on the dress and all over my face (although I did have to eat a little). Then we (reluctantly, on my part) put the war paint on, and ran to the end to grab our lyrics.

When we got back to the rest of our group, we saw that we would be singing 'Teenage Dream' by Katy Perry. Great. I've always wanted to sing Katy Perry. Embarassed, I sang along with my cabin.

When we were done, the winners were announced. "And the winner is: Shic Luna Cabin!"

"What?" I screamed. "I had to do all that embarassing shit and my cabin didn't even win? Are you guys freaking serious?"

The counsellor running the event didn't even blink. "Yup."

"And," Jacob added, grinning, "I got it all on tape."

**Review please :) It makes me smile :D**


	17. Chapter 17

**Hello everyone :) I'm so sorry I haven't updated in forever. School is literally 2x as busy as last year and I play lots of sports and do other stuff as well. But anyway, it's the holidays now, so I'm gonna try to get at least 3 or 4 more chapters up by the end of holidays. Then it will be exam time -_- Anyway, I hope you all had a nice holiday. I asked for the rights to Twilight for Christmas, but I didn't get them, so it all still belongs to Stephenie Meyer. Enjoy :)**

_Rosalie POV_

I can't believe Nessie did that to me. First of all, my face is going to be blue for a week because of that stupid snowball she hit me with. And on top of that, she called me a bitch. She's so gonna get it. Now I need to get revenge on her and Alice. It's gonna be harder to do it to her though, cause she's just a kid. How will I be able to justify what I do to her? And Jake wouldn't help me prank her, so my secrecy would be gone. Maybe I could just tell Bella and Edward . . . and Carlisle and Esme about what she did.

I was distracted from my thoughts when the bell rang and we had to move on to our next activity. My cabin's next activity was the obstacle course, and against all odds, Jacob was there too.

We sat and listened to the rules as Liz explained them. "Each person will have to go through the course once. First, you'll have to jump through the tires that we have set up here. Once you make it through, you need to grab and egg and a spoon from the table we have set up, and carry the egg on the spoon. If you drop it, you have to start over. Once you're done that, you need to weave through those pylons with a soccer ball. The snow will make it harder, but it is possible. When you get to the end, you have to grab an article of clothing from the bag, put it on the mannequin that is there properly, and run back as fast as you can to tag your teammate. Any questions?"

Since there were no questions, the race began. Jacob and I started to talk.

"So," I said. "Since our old plan against Alice didn't work so well, it looks like we need a new one."

"You're right. I don't have any ideas though."

"Me neither. But we only have a few days here, so we're gonna have to come up with something soon."

"I know."

We sat in silence for a few minutes, watching our teams play and trying to think of an idea. It appeared that my team was winning, but you never know what's gonna happen. Let's face it, though. My team is better, just because we are.

Suddenly, I had an idea.

"Jacob, I have an awesome idea!"

"Is that even possible?"

"Shut up."

He laughed and asked, "What's the idea?"

I explained.

"Wow. Never thought I'd say this, but that's genius."

"You have a lot to learn about me, mutt."

"Clearly. So, can you make up those flyers tonight then?"

"I can try," I said. "I just need to wait till everyone's asleep, then I can sneak into Erika's office and use her computer. I have a picture, too."

"Ok, good. And when can we-"

Jacob was cut off by Liz, who announced that the obstacle course was over. As predicted, my team won, and we got 35 points.

Thankfully, it was time to go to our last activity after that.

_Edward POV_

The last shift. Finally! My station was sliding races, and it was the most boring thing ever. The kids seemed to enjoy it, but it was incredible boring to run. The fact that I was doing it alone didn't really help either, because I had nobody to talk to.

When the kids showed up, I explained what they had to do.

"Okay, so as you can all see, there is a huge hill with a bunch of sleds on it here. You all need to line up at the top of the hill, and you will all go down the hill at the same time. Your places will be recorded, and you will get points for your team based on your place. So, for example, the person who comes in first will get 15 points, second place will get 12, third place will get 10, and so in. Whichever team has the most points at the end wins. Ready?"

When everyone was ready, they started. It was kind of boring to watch (even people falling started to get old after a while) but once they got to the finish line, I had to pay close attention to who came in what place. When they were done, I concluded that Fisher Cabin had gotten the most points. I think that's Alice's cabin, but I'm not entirely sure, because she wasn't there.

Now that we were done, it was time to go back to the dining hall to announce the winners and give out the prizes. We headed back as soon as the bell rang.

_Emmett POV_

OMG! OMG! OMG! It's time to announce the winners! I think my cabin is going to win. Since I wasn't with them, I don't know how well they did, but they should win, just because I am so awesome.

"Emmett, I don't think you're going to win. Your cabin didn't do that well," Edward told me.

"But I'm just so awesome that we'll win."

"That doesn't make sense."

"Your face doesn't make sense."

Edward just rolled his eyes and walked away. I sure showed him. He totally didn't have anything to say to that.

Just then, Caitlin walked up to the front of the dining hall. She waited for everyone to quiet down, the said, "And the winner is Hawk Cabin!"

Hawk Cabin (that's Jasper's cabin) began to cheer. I was shocked. How could my awesomeness not make my cabin win?

"This is so unfair!" I screamed.

There was a moment of silence, then Caitlin asked, "What's so unfair?"

"My team didn't win!"

"It's perfectly fair," she said. "Hawk Cabin got the most points, and your cabin didn't. So, they win and you don't."

"But I'm awesome!" I protested.

"I'm sure you are," Caitlin said, looking a little uneasy. I get that look a lot. I'm not sure why. "However, you still didn't win."

"But we should have!"

"Well, that would be unfair to the other teams," Caitlin said, looking exasperated.

I didn't know what to say, so I just went with, "Your face is unfair."

Before Caitlin could say anything, I felt someone smack me on the head. Hard. I turned around and saw Rosalie, and she looked mad.

"Stop saying that! It's the stupidest and most immature thing ever!" she exclaimed.

"Your face is-"

She cut me off, saying, "Don't you dare say that. One more work of that sentence and two weeks will turn into two months. Understood?"

"Yup."

"Good."  
Caitlin looked really disturbed now (she probably figured out what the two weeks was for), but she just continued with what she had been doing. "Anyway, Hawk Cabin will be receiving the camp's signature moose stuffies wearing a John Island T-shirt. In second place is Fisher Cabin, and each of them will be receiving a John Island flashlight. And in third place is Eagle Cabin, each of whom will be receiving a John Island keychain."

When all the cheering died down and the prizes had been handed out (well, not to me), Caitlin said, "So, I'd like to thank you all for participating in this. I don't know about you, but I had a lot of fun. If you'd like a snack, there is one available inside."

We all went inside to eat. When we sat down, I noticed that there was toast with peanut paste. I love peanut paste!

"It's not called peanut paste, Emmett," Edward said.

I was gonna say a 'your face' comment, but Rosalie was within earshot, so I just said, "Well, that's what I like to call it. I think it makes more sense."

"Whatever."

Even though vampires don't eat food, I decided to eat some peanut paste because it is just so awesome. As usual, it got stuck to the ceiling of my mouth, but that's ok. Rosalie can help me get it off again.

**I'm not sure if I'll get another update in by tomorrow, but in case I don't, I hope you all have a happy new year :) Review please :D**


	18. Chapter 18

**So, this chapter is a bit shorter than the last one, but at least it didn't take me two months to update ;) I hope you all had a good time last night, and that you all have a happy new year :) Enjoy**

_Alice POV_

When I got back to my cabin, after our snack, everyone went to bed, so I had to pretend to do the same. When I got into my sleeping bag, I noticed that it felt a little cold, but I didn't think much of it, since it was -25 degrees Celsius.

When I got out of my sleeping bag an hour later, after everyone had fallen asleep, I noticed that my designer pyjamas were covered in mud! I immediately knew who was responsible – Rosalie. I knew she'd want to get back at me for the accident with the juice. And the scary part is, there's probably more to it than this. I decided to go find her.

I put on some new pyjamas (designer, or course) and went to her cabin. I knocked lightly on the door, knowing she would hear me.

"Rose, I'd like to have a word with you."

I waited for a minute, but there was no answer. So, I went in. I looked around, but she wasn't there. So, I decided to go look for her.

It took a while, but I finally found her on Erika's computer. I walked up behind her quietly and when I was right behind her, I said, "Rose."

She jumped, which surprised me since it's hard to scare a vampire. She frantically changed the computer screen, which made me think she had something to hide.

"Alice."

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Just checking Facebook and stuff."

"You're lying," I said.

"Why would you say that?"

I smiled. "You don't even have Facebook up."

Despite her best efforts, Rose smiled too. "Right."

"So what are you really doing?"

"None of your business," she replied. "But what I want to know is what you are doing here. I assume you didn't just come to see what I'm doing on the computer."  
"No," I admitted. "I came here to see why the hell you put mud in my sleeping bag."

Rosalie giggled and said, "You know why. You put juice in my hair."

"Yeah, and in return, you tried to make me go bald! Isn't that enough revenge?"

"Well, no. It didn't work."

I sighed. "Can't we just forgive and forget?"

"Vampires don't forget."

"Fine, then can we just forgive?"

"Why, you scared?" she taunted.

"No," I lied. "I'm just tired of people constantly getting revenge on each other."

"Okay, fine then. You can forgive me."

Typical Rose. "And do you forgive me?" I asked.

"I guess."

"Okay then. Goodnight."

"See you later, Alice."

And with that, I left, still not feeling overly secure. I still think she has something planned for me.

_Rosalie POV_

Whew! That was close. Alice almost caught me making the flyers saying that she was looking for someone. I can just imagine what she'd say if she saw me photoshopping that picture of her.

I finished making the flyers and went to go find Jacob. I found him in a deep sleep. Calling his name wouldn't wake him up, so I put my hand on his back.

He shot up. "Holy shit, that's cold. What the hell, leech?"

"Be quiet!" I hissed. "You're gonna wake the whole camp up."

"Well, what do you want?"

"I made the flyers."

"Oh, good. Can I see?"

I showed them to him and he grinned. "Excellent," he said. "What do you say we go into town tomorrow night to put them up?"

"Sounds good. But I think we should do more than just in town. We need to put them up in a few places to get more results."

"Good point," he said. "Can I go back to sleep now?"

"If you want. See you later, mutt."

**Review please :D**


	19. Chapter 19

**So yeah, it's been 6 months. Sorry about that. I don't own Twilight.**

_Nessie POV_

When we got up this morning, we did the Polar Dive. It was horrible. My skin is so much warmer than everyone else's that the snow was freezing. But my cabin insisted that we do it so we could win a prize at the end of the week. The prize was probably just a keychain.

After freezing our butts off, we went to breakfast, which was bacon and eggs. After breakfast, we went to do another all-camp activity. This time we were snowshoeing and then having a campfire. Oh, joy.

As Rachelle and I were walking out (we managed to get together again) I saw Uncle Emmett arguing with Erika. They were talking about him going along.

"Please? I promise I won't start a forest fire again," Emmett said.

"I can't risk it. You could have killed everyone on the island last time."

"Please," Emmett pleaded. "I'll even let you confiscate my lighter and matches!"

Erika took the stuff, but still said that it was unsafe for him to go. I decided that it was time for me to step in.

"Erika," I said. "With all due respect, you're not being fair. Emmett made a mistake last year and he's most likely learned not to do it again."

"That may be so, but it was a mistake that put a lot of people in danger," she said.

"Yeah, but I do that all the time!" Emmett exclaimed.

"Not helping, Emmett," I said. "Just give him another chance. You've given me a lot of chances."

"A mistake that I deeply regret," Erika muttered.

Ouch. That hurt. But I guess I deserved it.

"Please?" I asked.

"Fine. As long as you both leave me alone," she said, and left.

"Thanks, Ness," Emmett said.

"Well, you helped me get out of the monkey situation, so I figured you should help me out too."

After that, I went back with Rachelle and Emmett went back with his cabin. We had a fairly peaceful walk until Emmett came up to me and said, "Hey Ness, do you have your iPod on you?"

"Yeah, why?"

"I want you to take a video of something for me."

"Okay, sure."

I got my iPod out and went to the camera section. I waited until Emmett was ready, then pressed 'record.' I watched as he took off one snowshoe, held it up like a tennis racket and whacked my Daddy on the back of the head with it. He turned around and yelled, "What the hell Emmett?" I laughed so hard I almost peed myself. That is so going on Youtube.

"Why the hell would you do that, Emmett?" Daddy yelled.

"I thought it would be funny."

"I see why Nessie says that all the time now."

Emmett came back over and high-fived me. Then he went back to snowshoeing.

"You have an awesome uncle," Rachelle said to me.

"I know."

"So how did he fall in love with your aunt then?"

"Don't ask me. I wasn't around then," I said.

"It just doesn't make sense."

"Excuse me?" said a voice.

Oh crap. I turned around to see Rosalie behind me. From the look on her face, she'd heard everything we said. It was a mix of hurt and fury. But mostly fury.

"Please tell me you didn't mean that."

Rachelle looked guilty, but didn't deny it. "I'm sorry, but it's true."

I looked at her and said, "I never even agreed, but they do say that opposites attract."

"Which would explain why people like you," she retorted.

Ouch. "You know, Rosalie, I'd slap you, but I don't want to get bitch on my hand."

Rosalie looked like she was about to say something back, but instead she just stormed off. Another win for me.

_Bella POV_

After the horrific showshoeing event (I fell multiple times), we had soup for lunch. I don't understand how I ever managed to choke that stuff down. Then, we had rest hour before going to our electives. I was sent to supervise the skiing - great choice, guys.

I decided that it wouldn't be a good idea for me to put on skis. Unfortunately, the campers thought otherwise, and when Erika came by, she agreed. So I put my skis on a basically just supervised, leaving the teaching to the other counsellor.

The class had gone fairly well. I hadn't had to do anything and I hadn't fallen - things were looking up. Then, it happened. I was standing near a hill (stupid me) and some random kid came up and pushed me. If I'd been on my feet, I could have easily dodged, but since I was on skis, I flew backwards down the hill. About halfway down, I began to tumble down the hill. The worst part is that Nessie was there, and although she hadn't been the one to push me, she was videotaping the incident. I'm going to have to raid her room when we get home and get rid of all those embarassing videos.

The second activity I had to supervise was figure skating, and it was fairly uneventful. I did have to put skates on, but I managed to just chill on the sidelines while everyone else made fools of themselves. When we were done, we went to supper.

**Reviews? :) If you're still reading it :P**


	20. Chapter 20

**So, I'm trying to do this thing where I actually try to update at least once a week...So far it's working, but it's only been two chapters, so we'll see ;) Feel free to send me a message or review to remind me when I get lazy. . . I won't get mad. So anyway, I don't own Twilight, and I don't own the ideas/text for any of the skits or songs below. . . I found them online :P Enjoy :)**

_Rosalie POV_

I had really wanted to go into town to put up those flyers tonight, but we had to go to a campfire. It's just that it would be priceless to see the look on Alice's face when a bunch of men come to hit on her. Especially the old ones.

So, anyway, each cabin had to come up with a skit, song or activity for the campfire. The catch was that we had to come up with it within an hour. We would vote after, and whoever won would get a prize.

My cabin decided to do a song called 'On Top of Spaghetti.' Apparently, it was a campfire classic. We were up first, so we went to sing our song.

_"__On top of spaghetti,  
All covered with cheese,  
I lost my poor meatball,  
When somebody sneezed._

_It rolled off the table,  
And on to the floor,  
And then my poor meatball,  
Rolled out of the door._

_It rolled in the garden,  
And under a bush,  
And then my poor meatball,  
Was nothing but mush._

_The mush was as tasty  
As tasty could be,  
And then the next summer,  
It grew into a tree._

_The tree was all covered,  
All covered with moss,  
And on it grew meatballs,  
And tomato sauce._

_So if you eat spaghetti,  
All covered with cheese,  
Hold on to your meatball,  
Whenever you sneeze."_

When we were done, Bella's cabin was up. She was in a cabin with fairly young kids, so they decided to do 'If You're Happy and You Know it Clap Your Hands.'

_"If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands._

_If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands._

_If you're happy and you know it and you really want to show it_

_If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands._

_"If you're happy and you know it, stomp your feet_

_If you're happy and you know it, stomp your feet._

_If you're happy and you know it and you really want to show it_

_If you're happy and you know it, stomp your feet._

_"If you're happy and you know it, spin around._

_If you're happy and you know it, spin around._

_If you're happy and you know it and you really want to show it_

_If you're happy and you know it, spin around."_

"This is so boring," Emmett yelled.

Bella looked a little insulted, so she said, "Yeah, well I'd like to see you do better."

"I thought you'd never ask!" Emmett exclaimed, and ran up to the front. He began to sing.

_"If you're sexy and you know it, clap your hands._

_If you're sexy and you know it, clap your hands._

_If you're sexy and you know it and you really want to show it_

_If you're sexy and you know it, clap your hands."_

Erika ran up to stop him. "Okay, that's enough!" she said.

"Awwwwww," whined Emmett.

I can't believe I'm married to this idiot.

_Alice POV_

My cabin is going to win, I just know it! We were doing a skit that we had named 'A Big Jerk."

We had one person at the front on all fours, pretending to be a lawnmower, and another person trying to start the lawnmower. The person said, "My lawnmower won't start! Can someone please help me?"

One by one, all the campers walked in and tried to start the lawnmower. Nobody could start it, so the first person finally asked, "Can I get a volunteer from the audience to try to start the lawnmower?"

We picked the most eager-looking kid and got him to try to start it. Finally, it started. The first person said, "Thanks! I guess all it needed was a big jerk!"

Of course, everyone burst out laughing. Clearly, we had been the best so far.

Jasper's cabin went next, and his cabin did a skit called 'Firing Squad.' I thought it seemed a little inappropriate for a campfire full of children, but he is a military guy, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.

In their skit, they had a firing squad march five people to the front to be executed. One asked the first prisoner if she had any last requests, and she said no. The squad was about to fire (with fake guns, of course) when the girl yelled "Hurricane" and pointed behind the squad. When they turned around to look, she ran away. This happened three more times, with the distractions being a tornado, a flood and an avalanche.

When they got to the last prisoner, she yelled "Fire!" as her distraction, so they shot.

When they were finished their skit, there was complete silence. Japsper yelled, "What? Nobody appreciates me?" and stormed off. I can't believe I'm married to this idiot.

_Bella POV_

After Jasper's very . . . um . . . interesting skit, Emmett's cabin was up. Of course, this was a reason for me to immediately be scared. When they began their performance, which was a poem that I can guarantee that Emmett wrote himself, I realized that my fears were well founded.

_"Narwals, Narwals  
Swimming in the ocean  
Causing a comotion  
'cause they are soo AWSOME  
Narwals, Narwals  
Pretty big and pretty wide  
They beat a polar bear in a fight  
Like an under water unicorn  
they have a kick-ass facial horn  
they are the jedi of the sea  
they stop Cathulu eating me  
Narwals  
They are Narwals  
Narwals  
Just don't let 'em touch your balls  
Narwals  
They are Narwals  
Narwals  
Defender of the shishkabob!"_

There was another moment of silence. I think everyone was a little weirded out. Not that I blame them.

Last was Edward's cabin. I figured that this one would be at least somewhat tame, but they ended up doing a skit about a guy's best friend dying. This would have been fine, if that friend's name wasn't Elizabeth. Not only was it a horrible experience for me, I don't think anyone truly understood it. He is in so much trouble. I can't believe I'm married to this idiot.

**Review please? :) It's nice to see that people are still reading this :D**


	21. Chapter 21

**So, I guess I didn't really stick to my once a week thing, but I do have a legitimate excuse this time...I was camping for two weeks and and no internet. However, I did have a lot of downtime so I managed to write a few chapters, so I'll be updating more frequently for a while. Twilight still belongs to Stephenie Meyer, enjoy :)**

_Rosalie POV_

Now that the campfire was finally over (Alice's cabin won, by the way), I was able to go find Jacob to put our plan into action. If I had to choose between all my plans, I would definitely say that this is the best one yet. Alice won't know what hit her. Or should I say what hit on her.

I caught up with Jacob in the trail (we were on our way to the dining hall for our snack), and said, "Hey, are you ready?"

"For what?" he asked.

"To put the flyers up."

"Oh! Yeah. Meet you at the dock in ten?" he asked.

"Ten? Why not now?"

Jacob looked a little sheepish. "I kind of wanted to have a snack first. They're serving nachos."

I rolled my eyes. "Sure."

"Great!" he exclaimed, and took off. I went back to my cabin to get the flyers, then headed to the dock. After about 20 minutes, Jacob showed up.

"You're late," I informed him.

"Sorry. Like I said, there were nachos."

I rolled my eyes. "Let's just go. We don't have that much time before people start thinking that our disappearance is a little strange."

"I don't need to worry. Everyone that I know back there knows that I wouldn't hook up with you if they paid me to."

I sighed. "That's not what I meant, you pervert. And you say that like it's happened before."

Silence.

"Okay, that's awkward," I said.

"We do some interesting stuff in Truth or Dare," he explained.

"Apparently."

He didn't say anything after that, so we spent the rest of the boat ride in silence. When we got to town, Jake wanted to know where we were going to be putting up the flyers.

"Well," I said, "I was thinking: Walmart, Independent, Value Village, Target, Zellers, the retirement home, the asylum-"

"Woah . . .you sure about that one?" Jake asked.

"Absolutely. Anyway, in the mall and random places on the street. Like on telephone poles and stuff."

"Sounds good," he agreed.

We set off for those places, putting flyers up as we went. When we'd put the last one up, we stepped back to admire my handiwork. The flyer said:

**ATTENTION ALL MEN!**

**My name is Alice Cullen, and I am looking for a boyfriend. Wel, actually, I am into polygamy (I think it's hot), so I am looking for multiple boyfriends.**

**About Me:**

**Name: Mary Alice Cullen (but call me Alice)**

**Age: 17**

**Height: 4'10**

**Interests: Men, sex, food**

**From: Forks, Washington, USA**

**If you are interested, please call me at 555-3825 (yes, I know what that spells, and I can't help it). I am not picky. If you are reading this, you are eligible. Can't wait to hear from you ;)**

"Yup," I said. "That ought to do it."

_Alice POV_

Yay! My cabin won! That was completely expected, of course, but it's still pretty cool. All the other skits were either completely lame, like Bella's, or completely weird, like Emmett's.

After the campfire was over, we went to the dining hall to have come nachos for a snack. Once we were there, I noticed that Rosalie was missing. Normally, this wouldn't concern me, but I know she's still mad about the juice. She doesn't get over things easily.

I looked into her future, just to see if she was planning anything for me. Not that I'm paranoid or anything. Nothing. Suddenly, an idea struck me (no, I didn't strike it back). I looked around and noticed that Jacob wasn't there either. Shit. She's conspiring against me and getting that mutt to hide her future again.

I suddenly remembered the other night, when I caught her hiding something on Erika's computer. Crap. I am in trouble. I'm not sure I even want to know what she's going to do to me.

I felt a pair of arms wrap around me, and Jasper said, "I can feel your fear from across the room. What's wrong?"

"Rosalie is plotting against me again."

Jasper laughed. "You're so dramatic. I'm sure she's not."

"She is!"

"Sure, sure."

"You'll see! And you'll be sorry!" I told him.

"Why? She's not plotting against me."

**Review please :) I know it's kind of short, but there's another one coming soon :)**


	22. Chapter 22

**So, here's another chapter, a little longer than last time. I'm going away until Sunday, so I probably won't update again till then, because I probably won't have computer access. I don't own Twilight. Enjoy :)**

_Jasper POV_

When I saw Rosalie this morning at breakfast, I noticed that she seemed to be in a sneaky mood. Maybe Alice was on to something. I decided to check it out. It wouldn't hurt anything, and Alice would probably be mad at me if I didn't try to save her from the evil clutches of Rosalie. *Sigh.* Girls can be so dramatic. I'm so glad I'm a guy. When we get mad at each other, we get into a fist fight and it's over. Girls on the other hand, will backstab and sabotage each other for weeks.

"Hey Rose," I said.

"Hi."

"How's it going?" I asked.

"Um . . . good, I guess."

"That's cool."

"You're weirding me out," she said. "Why don't you just say whatever it is you want to say?"

"Wow. . . you're blunt. And quick to make assumption," I commented.

"And you suck at being sneaky," she countered.

"Apparently so. I guess I'll just say it then. What did you do to Alice?"

Rosalie smiled and said, "You'll see. I apologize for the annoyance that it might cause you, but it's worth it."

"Maybe to you."

She smiled wryly. "Well, that's all I care about."

_Bella POV_

After breakfast, we had to do cabin activities, which I was dreading. Mine was downhill skiing. Again. Somehow, I always seem to be stuck with the dangerous sports.

I was very relieved when Erika made an announcement that we would be cancelling our morning activites because of the random snowstorm. And when I say random, I mean it. When we came to breakfast, it had been nice and sunny. Now, you couldn't see anything except white when you looked out the window. Canada . . .

We were going to be playing a riddle game. Erika would read us riddles and we would have to try to guess the answers. It would be counsellors against campers, which seemed a little unfair to me, but whatever. I didn't really care either way if we won or lost.

I grabbed a table with my family and a few other counsellors. While we were waiting for the game to start, Emmett said conversationally (and randomly), "You know, I 'saw' a lynx last night. Those things are pretty cool."

I knew that when he said 'saw,' he really meant 'ate,' but I played along anyway. "Yeah, I saw one too. Aren't they beautiful animals?"

"Oh yes, Emmett agreed. "Lynxes are my new favourite animal."

I felt like being goofy, so I said, "Emmett, the correct plural form is lynxi."

"Ok, fine then. Lynxi are my new favourite animal."

Everyone burst out laughing, and Edward said, "I love how you just slipped that in there. It was so natural."

"Thanks," I said. "I wasn't even trying to trick him. I was just saying that because it's the type of thing that I would naturally say."

"I know. That's why it was so awesome."

Our fun was interrupted by Erika telling us that it was time to begin. She explained how the game would work, saying that teams were allowed to discuss the answers, and if someone knew the answer, they could shout it out. Whichever team got the answer right first would get a point. The first one to five points would win.

"Okay," she said. "First riddle. I am inside but I'm outside, and I'm moving but I'm still. Where am I?"

"In a car!" yelled a camper.

"Correct! One point for the campers! Next riddle. I fall but I never break, and I break but I never fall. What am I?"

I thought about it for a minute, then it hit me. "Night and day," I shouted. "There's nightfall and daybreak."

"Correct!" Erika exclaimed. "Next riddle. What can go down a chimney up but can't go up a chimney down?"

"An umbrella!" a camper yelled.

"Correct! Next riddle. What strikes but never kills?"

"An idea," Alice called out. I guess she would know, it happens to her all the time. Then we do something crazy.

"Correct!" Erika exclaimed. "The score is now 2-2. Ok, next riddle. I go all around the world, but I stay in one spot. What am I?"

"A stamp!" yelled a camper.

"Good . . . here's a harder one. I stand on one leg and my heart is in my head. What am I?"

There was a moment of silence, then Emmett shouted, "A compressed flamingo!"

Everyone laughed, but of course that wasn't the answer. In the end, nobody could get that one. The answer was a cabbage, which made no sense to me.

"Okay," Erika said. "Next riddle. A man has been sentenced to death. He has three options for how to die: he can be given a lethal injection, he can be shot or he can be left in a cage with man-eating lions that haven't eaten in two years. Which one does he choose?"

"He chooses to be shot!" a camper yelled, "because it's fast."

"Try again," Erika said.

"The lions!" Liz (Jasper's co-counsellor) called out.

"Why?" asked Erika.

"Because if they haven't eaten in two years, they'd be dead."

"Exactly!" said Erika. "Next riddle. A plane crashed right on the border between Canada and the US. Where do they bury the survivors?"

I'd heard this one before, so I yelled out, "They don't bury the survivors!"

"Correct," Erika said. "The counsellors now have four points. If they get this next question right, they win. Two mothers and two daughters are out walking when it starts to snow. They decided that they need boots. They all wear size 7, and the store that they chose had three pairs of size 7 boots left. All three women walked out of the store wearing a pair of size 7 boots. How is this possible?"

"There were only three people!" Emmett yelled. "A daughter, a mother and a grandmother."

"That's correct," Erika said. The rest of us just sat there in a shocked silence. We'd expected to win, but we never thought that Emmett would be the one to win it for us. "The counsellors win," she said.

"What's our prize?" someone (Sophie, I think) asked.

"The satsifaction of winning."

"Are you freaking serious?"

Erika smiled. "No. Your prize is a bag of Skittles. You each get one, that is, not one for all of you to share. Now, who wants to play bingo?"

**Review please :)**


	23. Chapter 23

**Why hello again :) As promised, it is Sunday, and I am updating :) This chapter is a little shorter than the other one, but what can you do? SM owns Twilight, but I own bacon, and that's better. Enjoy :)**

_Nessie POV_

Luckily, the weather cleared up in the afternoon. I think we were all getting a little tired of riddle games, bingo and dance competitions (although I have to admit, those were pretty entertaining).

My cabin was going to go play hockey. I was not over thrilled about this, because hockey is, like, Canada's sport, and I'm not Canadian, but what could I do? We headed down to the ice rink (aka the lake). My cabin was playing against Uncle Jasper's cabin, thank God. It would have been just unfair to make us play against boys. Although I suppose we'll have to do that tomorrow anyway, since we're having a mini NHL tournament.

We played two games - my cabin won one, and Uncle Jasper's cabin won the other. It was actually pretty uneventful, although I did manage to 'accidentally' slapshot Katie in the back of the head. Damn the camp for making us wear helmets.

_Alice POV_

It was the weirdest thing ever. I was at my afternoon activity, figure skating, and I kept getting these very suggestive texts from random numbers. Normally, I would have dismissed this, but I got about 15 of them within an hour, and they all knew my name. At first, it wasn't that bad. The first one said:

_"Hey Alice. My name is Keith. I'm 19 years old, and I'd love to hook up with you, if you know what I mean ;)."_

Then, it got worse.

_"Hello Alice. My name is Clarence. I'm 80 years old, and I haven't had any real fun since my wife left me back in '82, if you catch my drift. Although that's not all I want you to catch. When are you free?"_

_ "Yo, Alice. Eddie here. I'm 28, and I mostly live at the asylum down the road, but sometimes I get out for good behaviour. I'm not usually good, but I might make an exception for you. Wanna bang?"_

Some were too vulgar to even think about. Like the one from that 62 year old . . . I think I'm scarred for life.

By the time the hour was up, I was 99.9% sure I knew who was responsible for this. After all, who else holds a grudge against me, and believes that it is appropriate to give my phone number to 15 random men. . . and one woman, but nevermind that.

I found her between activities.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" I screamed.

"Trouble in paradise?" Rosalie asked. "I would have thought you'd be flattered by all the attention."

"What did you do?" I asked. "Give my phone number to a bunch of random people on the street?"

"Technically, yes. I put up posters."

"Oh, great. So there's going to be more," I realized.

"Oh, yes."

"Screw you."

Rosalie smiled, "Oh, I'm not the one who is getting screwed."

I sighed. "Can we at least call it even now?"

"I'll think about it," she replied.

"Great. I guess I should be expecting another attack then."

"Expect the unexpected," she said simply.

I slapped her in the face and said, "I bet you didn't expect that, did you?" Then, before she could do anything else, I walked away. I think I just dug my own grave.

_Nessie POV_

I was building a snowman during one of my activities this afternoon (I may or may not have gotten banned from skiing for the day for doing something to Katie. And that something was definitely not attaching her skis to a tree with fishing line so it randomly caught halfway down the hill.) when an idea hit me.

I motioned for Rachelle to come join me in my snowman filled corner (seriously, I'd already made six). When she arrived, I said, "I just got the best idea for a prank tonight."

"What?" she asked.

"We are going to wait until everyone is asleep. Then, I'll steal all of Katie's stuff and we'll meet at the dining hall. Then, we'll tape or glue or whatever all her stuff to the ceiling, and put her underwear near the counter where everyone can see it when they go to get food."

"Oh my God! Yes!"

I am a genius.

**Thanks for reading, please review :) You can expect another update before Wednesday (unless I forget) :)**


	24. Chapter 24

**So, I wasn't really planning to update tonight, but the discovery of two large spiders in my bedroom last night ensured that I wouldn't be getting much sleep, so I figured that I should at least do something useful with my time. I obviously still do not own Twilight. Enjoy :)**

_Nessie POV_

It took a while for everyone to fall asleep tonight. We'd had another dance competition after supper, since it had been such a big hit this morning. This time we'd been in groups (surprise, surprise, we were with our cabins) and we were given a song, then we had ten minutes to come up with a dance routine. Whoever had the best routine won. My cabin ended up winning, all thanks to me. I do Zumba dance classes at home, and a lot of the songs that were played tonight happened to be Zumba songs. So, anyway, I think everyone in my cabin was still hyped up from winning.

Finally, everyone fell asleep, so I grabbed Katie's bag, and anything else I could see and headed toward the dining hall. I still had to be really quiet since my family doesn't sleep and I wouldn't want them to hear me sneaking around.

On the way there, I bumped into Auntie Rose.

"Nessie! What are you doing?" she asked.

"Um . . ." I said.

"Don't bother trying to lie. There aren't too many stories that I would believe at this time of night," she pointed out.

"I'm pranking someone," I admitted.

"Small world. . . me too."

"Really?" I asked, intrigued. "Who?"

"Alice. But tell her and I will cheerfully beat you to death with a feather."

"A feather?"

"Yup," she said. "Who are you pranking?"

"Katie, this girl that I hate."

"Oh, right. I've heard about her."

"So," I asked. "Why are you still pranking Alice? Didn't you already get her back?"

"Well, yeah, but then she slapped me."

"Why?" I asked.

"Well, she asked if we were even and she could stop expecting to be attacked, so I told her to expect the unexpected. Then she slapped me and said, 'Bet you didn't expect that, did you?' So now I need revenge again."

I laughed. "That's awesome. She probably got it off the internet, but it's still awesome."

"If you say so. Anyway, good luck with your prank. I won't tell on you if you won't tell on me."

"Deal," I agreed, and we went our separate ways. Not that it really mattered. I suspected that we would both get caught anyway. When people found Katie's stuff in the dining hall tomorrow, I would be the first suspect, and Alice would know exactly who pranked her.

I finally met up with Rachelle, and we got to work. We didn't really have much to work with, so we had to come up with some pretty creative ways of getting her stuff around the dining hall. When we were done, we snuck back to bed before we could get caught.

In the morning, I was woken up by Katie's scream. Maybe it was because all her stuff was gone. maybe it was because she couldn't get dressed without her clothes, and she didn't want to go out in her slutty pyjamas. Or maybe she just broke a nail. Who knows?

"My stuff is gone!" she screamed.

I rolled over and tried to go back to sleep.

"Where'd you put it?"

I ignored her (well, assuming that that had been directed at me). She threw her pillow at me (one of the few things I hadn't taken).

"What did you do with my stuff?" she was still screaming.

My eardrums were momentarily rescued by Victoria, who asked, "Katie, what's wrong? Is the screaming really necessary?"

"Yes, it is," Katie replied, "Because all my stuff is gone. And she took it!" I assumed that she was pointing at me, but I wasn't positive because I was still trying to sleep.

"Nessie?" Victoria asked.

"Uh-huh?" I groaned.

"Nessie . . ."

"Yeah?"

"Nessie . . ."

What the hell was with all the repetition? I sat up. "What?" I snapped.

"Did you take all of Katie's clothes?" she asked.

"No."

"This isn't how this works. You're supposed to say 'sorry' now."

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"Obviously, you don't watch Saturday Night Live," Victoria said. "You actually somehow got the first part right, but after I ask you what you did, you're supposed to say 'sorry.' Ok? Let's try this again."

I vaguely remembered seeing something like this on TV one time when Grandma and Grandpa were watching it, but it had gone a little differently.

"Nessie?" Victoria asked.

"Stick it, lady."

"Nessie!" she exclaimed.

"Shove it, lady."

"Nessie . . ."

"Suck it, bitch," I told her.

"Nessie, go to Erika's office."

"Sure," I said. "Anything to get away from you freaks in here."

So, I got up and went to Erika's office. At this point, I was so familiar with the place that I just walked in and sat down.

It took a minute for Erika to notice me and ask, "What are you doing here?"

I explained the entire story, making sure to put more emphasis on the weird part. Hopefully, the fact that I'd dealt with some psycho stuff would help me get off more easily.

"Well, I agree that her method of inquisition is a little weird. Maybe she was just trying to weird you out so you'd admit something. Now, do you have Katie's stuff?"

"Nope," I said. So far, I'm not technically lying.

"Did you hide Katie's stuff?"

"Nope," I said. "It's all in plain sight. She just hasn't looked in the right place."

"Oh dear . . ." Erika said. I had a feeling she was about to say more, but then her phone rang. She talked to whoever it was for a minute, then said, "There's a situation in the dining hall. Odds are, you had something to do with it, so you can just wait here for me to come back."

"Will do."

**Review please...because I updated so quickly? :) I might update one more time before I flee the country (just kidding - but seriously, I am going home on Wednesday, and may not have internet access for about a week) but if not, maybe I can spend my plane ride writing more chapters :P**


	25. Chapter 25

**Hello again! I hope the fact that I'm updating again now will make up the fact that I probably can't update for a week. Though I'll probably find time to write, I'm quite certain the place where I'm going doesn't have Wifi. (how will I ever survive). Anyway, here is your chapter, see previous chapters for disclaimers. :)**

_Rosalie POV_

I can't believe that bitch slapped me! I have to admit, it was a little bit funny, but that's not the point. I need to end this once and for all, and I know just how to do it.

After meeting Nessie last night, I'd headed toward Alice's cabin to prank her. Of course, she'd seen me coming and knew exactly what I'd been planning to do, because I'd forgotten to get Jacob in on this one. She was waiting for me outside her cabin and ruined my entire plan.

So, my new plan was to do nothing. Of course, I wouldn't tell Alice that I was going to do nothing. Actually, I would hint at how I had some big plan in the works, so she'd be paranoid all the time. And she won't see anything in her visions, so she'll just assume that I'm working with Jacob again. It's perfect!

When I walked into the dining hall for breakfast, I first noticed that somebody's stuff was all over - on the ceiling, walls, floor, tables, benches . . . I guess this must have been Nessie's prank. I had to admit that it wasn't too bad as far as pranks go. She never even showed up to breakfast, so I had to assume that she'd gotten caught beforehand. Probably when the victim realized that her stuff was gone.

I decided to start my plan.

"Hey, Alice," I said.

"Hey."

"How's it going?" I asked.

"Um, fine . . ."

"Really?" I asked, feigning surprise.

"Yeah, why?" she asked, sounding a little suspicious.

I smiled. "Oh, no reason." I said, then I walked away. Phase one complete.

_Bella POV_

So, we were having an all camp hockey tournament today, and I was actually really excited. A little-known fact about me: I am amazing at hockey. I used to play all the time when I was a kid, but I had to give it up when I moved to Forks.

We were having a mini NHL tournament. We each had to pick an NHL team, and then we would play games against each other to see who won 'the Stanley Cup.' I wanted my team to be the Phoenix Coyotes (of course, they were my favourite team growing up), but I was outnumbered by all the Canadians who wanted to be the Ottawa Senators. I guess it could have been worse - Edward was stuck with the Toronto Maple Leafs. Emmett was stuck with the Montreal Canadiens - not that he cared he was just mad about the fact that they spelled the word 'Canadians' wrong. He wouldn't listen to us when we tried to explain that it was French because they're from Québec. Then he got mad about the 'funny line' over the 'e' in Québec. Anyway, Jasper's cabin was the Edmonton Oilers, Alice's was the Calgary Flames, Rose's was the Vancouver Canucks, and Nessie's cabin had chosen the Pittsburg Penguins, because they all thought Sydney Crosby was hot.

Since we had four spaces available where we could play, we got through the tournament pretty quickly. Instead of doing three twenty minute periods, we did two fifteen minute periods, with lots of switching on and off. My team played against Edward's team first. When the game was over (my team won 3-0) he said to me, "You never told me you were good at hockey."

So, I replied, "You never told me you were bad at hockey."

"Touché. But seriously."

"Well," I said. "I guess it just never came up, but I did play for about 12 years."

"Huh. You never told me that."

"I can't tell you all my secrets. Somebody has to be able to keep them from you," I smiled.

"I guess that's true."

We each went our separate ways to play other games. My team won all of ours, and I'm not really sure how everyone else did. I know Edward and Emmett's teams didn't do that well (ironic, isn't it?). Rosalie's, Jasper's and Nessie's did okay, I think. When it came down to it, it was my team against Rosalie's for the finals. Since we were the team captains, we had to shake hands before the game.

"Good luck," she said. "You'll need it."

"Maybe," I replied, "But you'd better get your drinking fountains ready anyway."

"What?"

I smiled. "There won't be any cups in Vancouver."

"Haha. Let's just do this."

So, we did. It was a tough game, but in the end, my team won 2-1.

"And the Stanley Cup goes to the Ottawa Senators!" Erika announced, handing me a small plastic trophy. Pretty cheap, but I'll take it.

"Nice job, Bella," Rose congratulated me. "Too bad that will never happen in real life."

"Maybe not, but I don't really give a damn, because the Senators aren't my team anyway. Nice try though."

**Review please :) I'm sad that I have to leave here tomorrow, so a review will cheer me up and inspire me to write more :D**

**And on a side note, do any of you happen to know any good, but harmless pranks to play on your teachers? If so, could you let me know? I need to prepare for the upcoming school year ;) Thanks :)**


	26. Chapter 26

**So, yeah. It's been snce August. . . sorry about that. All I can say is that I was so busy with my last year of high school and preparing to apply to school and stuff. And then, when I actually got time to do stuff on Christmas break, I couldn't find my notebook where I wrote all my info and rough drafts down. I finally found it tonight (unsurprisingly, it was under my bed) so I was able to update. Merry Christmas everyone :)**

_Emmett POV_

Stupid, stupud, stupid, stupid, stupid. They don't even know how to spell the word 'Canadian.' I do. I accidentally found out when I drank a bottle of 'Molson Canadian' stuff. I never forgot after that. But, anyway, I was so mad that I had to be on a team whose name was spelled wrong. Everyone was trying to tell me that it's spelled that way because it's French, but I'm not French, therefore, it's spelled wrong.

Anyway, my team did pretty badly. Not quite as badly as Eddie's (or Jake's, but his cabin is full of nerds), but pretty badly. I definitely did not lock myself in an outhouse and cry until I found out what we're doing tonight. Wait for it . . . a song spoof-off! That's where we all pick a song, then we make a spoof of it, then whoever has the best song wins! It's gonna be great! I already have an idea.

I told my idea to my cabin, and, of course, they loved it. We practised until it was time to go to the campfire, which was where we were performing the songs.

When we got there, Erika welcomed everyone and said all the boring stuff she usually says. I tuned out because I saw a pinecone. Those things are just so fascinating!

Jasper's cabin was up first, and they sang a spoof of 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.' They started to sing.

_"Sammy the crosseyed cowboy_

_ Had a very shiny whip._

_ And if you ever saw it,_

_ You would even say it shines._

_ All of the other cowboys_

_ Used to laugh and call him names._

_ They never let poor Sammy_

_ Join in any cowboy games._

_ Then one foggy Christmas eve_

_ The Sheriff came to say_

_ Sammy with your whip so bright_

_ Won't you whip my wife tonight?_

_ Then all the cowboys loved him_

_ And they shouted out with glee_

_ Sammy the crosseyed cowboy,_

_ You'll go down in history!"_

HAHAHAHA! That has to be the best song I've ever heard! Well, not quite as good as mine, but pretty good.

Next up was Alice's cabin. They are doing a spoof of Jingle Bells. Christmas songs are so out of season right now. I mean, oh my lanta, it's March, people. March! Losers.

They began to sing.

_ "Dashing through the snow,_

_ On a pair of broken skis,_

_ Over the hills we go,_

_ Bashing into trees, HAHAHA_

_ The snow is turning red,_

_ I think I'm almost dead,_

_ I woke up in the hospital_

_ With stitched in my head!_

_ Oh, Jingle Bells, Batman smells, _

_ Robin laid an egg!_

_ Batmobile lost a wheel _

_ And Joker got away, hey!_

_ Batman's in the kitchen, _

_ Robin's in the hall,_

_ Joker's in the bathroom, _

_ Peeing on the wall!_

_ HEY!"_

HAHAHAHAHAHA! That has to be the best song I've ever heard! Well, not quite as good as mine, but pretty good. I know I said that about the other song, but I really mean it this time.

"Emmett, everyone knows that song," said Edward.

"Yeah, well, I didn't! So there!"

Next up was Jake's cabin. The nerd cabin. Great, that means a boring performance. They said that they were doing a spoof of 'We are the Champions.' At least it's not Christmas-y.

They began to sing.

_ "It was 1867,_

_ Canada wanted to be free,_

_ Sir John A. Macdonald_

_ Was the only one who could see_

_ That they needed a hero,_

_ Someone who could lead._

_ It was something they believed he could do_

_ And he came through. . ._

_ Cause he was the champion of Confederation,_

_ And he kept on fighting until the end._

_ He was the champion, he was the champion,_

_ No time for Britain,_

_ Cause he was the champion._

_ Then he died."_

Well, that was lame. I didn't really get it, but I think that's just because I'm not Canadian. But maybe I'm not the only one, cause nobody laughed. Or it just wasn't funny, that's always a possibility.

Next up was Nessie's cabin, singing a parody of 'Joy to the World.' I know I was complaining about Christmas songs, but I freaking love this song. They started to sing.

_ "Joy to the world, _

_ Our counsellor's dead._

_ We barbecued her head._

_ What happened to her body?_

_ We flushed it down the potty._

_ Around and round it goes,_

_ Around and round it goes,_

_ Around and round, around it goes!"_

HAHAHA! That's funny! As long as I'm not the counsellor that they're talking about. They better not freaking be talking about me. They are so gonna get it!

"They weren't talking about you, Em," said Edward. "They were talking about their counsellor."

"Oh," I said, feeling dumb.

Next up was supposed to be cabin, but then the most awful, tragic thing happened! It started to snow! Like really snow. Like snowing so much that I thought I would be buried and lost forever!

So, instead of singing my awesome Justin Bieber parody, we got to go eat our snacks early. Whoopee. Damn weather.

**Well, I hope you enjoyed the chapter, and that I still actually have readers for this :P I started this plotline with the prequel to this when I was in grade 9, and now I'm still writing it in grade 12. I know my sense of humour and (hopefully) my writing style and maturity have improved, so I'm just going to hope that I haven't changed too much that the story isn't funny anymore. If I have, just say so, and I'll try to go back to what I used to do . . . no promises though ;)**

**Review please? It's Christmas :D Can it be my present? :)**


	27. Chapter 27

**So that took a little longer than I expected...In my opinion, this chapter kind of sucks. . . a lot. But it needed to be in here as a filler so the coming chapters would make sense, and also so I could start wrapping the story up. I can't make any promises about when I can update again, but I will try to do so soon. :)**

_Nessie POV_

When I woke up this morning, I was happy and sad at the same time. It was our last real day of camp (tomorrow would mostly be packing and leaving). On one hand, I would never have to come back here, and I would never have to see Katie again. On the other hand, I would have to go back to school, and I might never get to see Rachelle again.

I decided that since it was the last day, and I wouldn't see most of these people ever again, I needed to play the most epic prank ever. I wasn't quite sure what to do, but I had the whole day to think about it and the whole night to pull it off. I'd done some pretty amazing things in the past, so I wasn't too worried.

I went to breakfast in deep thought . . . my prank from yesterday had been pretty good - and since they couldn't prove that it was me, I didn't get caught - but I needed something better that would blow everyone away.

Hmmmm. I was sitting there eating my eggs and bacon when it hit me. This truly would be the best prank ever. It would literally affect everyone at camp, and I wouldn't even really get in trouble for it. I mean, what can they do to me on the last morning of camp? Kick me out? I'm going home anyway.

_Rosalie POV_

So, Alice has definitely been paranoid for the past day. I've been doing everything in my power to make sure of it, but now I'm not sure if I should continue to scare her or just do something. I could also stop all together until she is lulled into a false sense of security, and then drop the bomb. I have eternity, so this could literally go on forever.

When we were done breakfast, I headed to my first cabin activity, making sure to bump into Alice on the way by.

"Watch where you're going," I snarled.

Alice took a step back and said, "I'm sorry." She was trying really hard not to show it, but I could tell that she was nervous. I am definitely going to drag this out longer. Having Alice live in paranoia is way better than getting the prank over with.

_Alice POV_

Oh my God. It's killing me that I don't know what Rosalie is going to do. Right now, I can't see anything in my visions, but I've learned that that means nothing. And I can't even retaliate, because then it will get worse.

I should be used to this by now. This happens every 30 years or so. It's kind of like she's PMSing every 30 years instead of 30 days (but luckily, it doesn't last 7 years). This is the first time I've been the target - last time it was Emmett, which wasn't fun for anyone - and I think I'm just gonna have to wait it out. Or, I could shift her attention to someone else. That would work too.

**Thanks for reading, please review. :) And also, feel free to mention if you have any ideas for Nessie's prank.**


	28. Chapter 28

**So yeah. It's been six months, probably more. If anyone is still reading this, thanks. If not, I totally understand. But I really don't like to leave things unfinished, and since I'm going to university in the fall and I won't have time to do this once I'm there. So, I still don't own Twilight (just had to fit that in there somewhere) but I am going to promise that this story will be finished by the end of the summer. :)**

_Bella POV_

Thank God. I was so glad that today was our last day of camp. Then I would never have to come back to this stupid place. Ever. Like I mean ever. All it makes me think of is Edward missing that damn piano, Emmett being an idiot and my entire family pranking each other. And that video that Esme has, but we're all just trying to forget that.

Anyway, I was sitting at my first cabin activity, when Alice came up to me (her cabin activity was nearby).

"Hey, Alice. What's up?" I asked.

"I'm really nervous," she confessed.

"Why?"

"Well, you see," she explained, "You may not have noticed, but for the last week, Rose and I have been pranking each other. Except it's mostly been her pranking me. She got me back for something or other yesterday, but then I slapped her so I think she's going to her me back again. She hasn't done anything, though, so I'm just really paranoid."

"Oh," I said. "Well, I said, I haven't heard that she's going to do anything, so I can't really help you."

"Well, thanks anyway," Alice said, then went back to her activity.

I am so sick of everyone pranking each other. At first it was funny, but now it's just getting to be stupid and annoying. Like that time when I had a job at a candy store, and I put sour syrup in my coworker's water. It was funny the first time, but then it just got annoying (or so she said).

I decided that I was going to end this once and for all.

_Rosalie POV_

My first cabin activity was figure skating. When that was over, we were meeting at the dining hall to begin the snowball fight that we had been preparing for all week. I wasn't entirely sure how we were going to decide a winner or anything, but I guess that's why Caitlin was going to explain it all.

We headed to the dining hall when it was time, and sat in the snow while we waited.

Eventually, Caitlin came outside and welcomed everyone. "Okay, this is how it's going to work," she said. "Every cabin has their snowfort. Basically, you hide inside your snowfort and throw snowballs at everyone else's fort. The first half hour of the activity will be just for making snowballs, and then the fight will begin. Whoever has the last standing fort will win the fight. Let's go!"

We all made our way to our forts and began to make snowballs, since we had a limited amount of time. Well, actually, the girls in my cabin made snowballs. I don't do physical labour, so I just wandered around, pretending to check out everyone else's fort.

While I was wandering, Bella approached me and asked if she could talk to me. When I agreed and we'd walked away from the centre of everybody, she said, "All this pranking is really pissing me off."

"And?" I asked, slightly annoyed.

"I think you and Alice should just end all your crap."

"I can't do that until I've gotten her back," I said.

"I know. That's why I'm going to help you get her back," Bella told me.

"How?" I asked.

"I will tell you her biggest secret," Bella said, then she leaned in and whispered the secret in my ear.

"Well that's pretty frigging stupid," I said, once I knew the secret.

"I know," Bella agreed. "But she'd be horrified if anyone found out. So, do what you will with this." She smiled, and walked away.

Alice, you are so going down.

_Emmett POV_

OMG OMG OMG! A snowball fight! I am so freaking excited. Our fort is totally gonna win. It took a lot of convincing, but I managed to persuade my cabin to make our fort a replica of the Leaning Tower of Pisa, but without the leaning part, because that would be structurally unsound (People think I'm stupid, but I'm actually a real expert at physics). My logic was that since the Tower of Pisa is tall and kind of thin, it would be a lot harder to knock down than if it was just a huge wall.

The snowball fight began exactly 30 minutes after we started to make snowballs. I think this is really unfair, because Caitlin said we would have half an hour to make snowballs and we got cheated out of seven minutes. The fight went on for an hour, and when it was over, my cabin won! I can't believe my cabin actually won! Our prize was ice cream sundaes tonight at dinner, which I thought was pretty freaking awesome, until I remembered that I'm not supposed to eat. I used to eat stuff all the time, like peanut paste, but then one time I threw up while I was in bed with Rosalie and she won't let me eat anymore.

"Ha. You are so whipped," Edward said.

"Get out of my head!" I screamed. "At least I'm not in love with a piano!"

"How the hell did you even win?" Edward asked. "Your fort was literally just a giant stick."

"Because, dear brother," I said. "I am just that awesome."

**Review please :)**


	29. Chapter 29

_Nessie POV_

After the snowball fight, which somehow, Emmett's cabin managed to win (I mean, come on, this is the guy who once ate a banana and commented on how you shouldn't eat that many apples in a day), we went to have lunch. Lunch was tomato soup and grilled cheeses. Before we ate, Erika went up to the front of the room to make an announcement.

"Okay, everyone," Erika said. "Our original plan was for everyone to get up at seven tomorrow morning and pack so we could be ready to leave at 8:30. However, the plans have changed, and we now have to leave by seven o clock tomorrow morning. So, we are going to do all of our packing and cleaning this afternoon, and then we can do something fun tonight."

The dining hall was filled with groans as soon as Erika said this, but I was excited, because an idea hit me just as she finished her announcement. I now knew what to do for my epic prank tonight, and I couldn't wait to get started.

Before we returned to our cabins, I managed to talk to Rachelle for a minute. I quickly told her the plan for tonight, and she told me that she loved it. I would just have to find a way to get all my family out of their cabins, because I'd get caught if they were still there.

I was just finishing explaining the plan when Victoria walked by and grabbed my arm and said, "Come on."

"I wasn't finished talking!" I protested.

"I'm finishing for you. I don't have time for your crap," she said, and dragged me off. I could have resisted, but that would have looked a little bit suspicious.

When we were far enough from Rachelle that Victoria would be certain I wouldn't run back, I told her to let me go. Surprisingly, she did. We were walking civilly back to the cabin when Emmett danced by, singing "Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SQUARE BOB SPONGE PANTS! Oh, shit. That wasn't right."

"Emmett," I called, "Can I talk to you for a sec?"

Emmett walked over and said, "Sure, what's up?"

I told my cabin to go on without me, and Victoria told me there was no chance in hell of that happening. Well, she didn't actually say that, but it's what she meant.

"No worries. I will escort the lady back to her cabin," Emmett said.

Victoria looked skeptical but left me with Emmett anyway. Once they were all out of earshot, I told him, "I need a favour."

"Sure," he said. "What can I do for you?"

"My friend and I want to pull an epic prank tonight while everyone is sleeping, but we won't be able to do it if you guys are around in your cabins. Would you be able to get everyone in our family out of their cabins at, like, three in the morning and take them far away?"

"How far?" he asked.

"I don't know, like to the other side of the island."

"Yeah, I think I can do that."

"Thanks," I smiled. "I owe you one."

I smiled as I walked back to my cabin. This was going to work out perfectly.

_Emmett POV_

I wonder what Nessie's prank is. Maybe I should have asked her. I mean, what if she just wants us out of the cabin so she can prank us? Nah, that's probably not it. I mean, how stupid does she think I am?

I decided to put my part of Nessie's plan into action. I would start with Eddie. But first I had to get into no-thinking mode. It was surprisingly easy for me. _Ok, Emmett. Think about going on a 3am adventure. That's all you're doing. It has nothing to do with Nessie._ Ok, I've got this. I walked into Edward's cabin and said, "Hey, Eddie!"

"My name isn't Eddie," he answered, without looking up from the floor that he was washing.

"Can I talk to you for a sec?"

"I guess," he said, looking mildly annoyed.

"Have you ever wondered what kinds of things vegetables think about?"

"No," Edward replied.

"Me neither. But that's not what I was going to ask. I actually wanted to know if you can come on a 3am adventure with me tonight."

"Why?"

"I want to explore the island," I explained. "And we have nothing else to do."

"Yeah, that's true. I guess I'll go."

"Awesomeness! See you tonight!"

Next, I went to go find Rosalie. I figured this would be the hardest one, so I should probably get it over with. I went to her cabin, but she wasn't there, so I went to go find her. I found her near behind her cabin, picking up ski and snowboard equipment. Since she didn't know I was there, I took all my clothes except my underwear off, hoping that it would help my cause.

She turned around, and just stared. "What are you doing?"

"I just came to ask you if you wanted to come on a 3am adventure tonight."

"Not really."

"Please," I begged.

"I already told you Emmett, two weeks," she said in an exasperated voice.

"Oh, it's not for that! I just want to explore," I explained.

"Then why aren't you wearing clothes?" she asked, confused.

"I don't know," I answered, and put my clothes back on.

"Well, I guess I will come with you, but remember, you are getting nothing.

"That's fine," I said. See you at three!"

After I asked Rosalie, I decided to go ask Alice. I walked into her cabin, and she said, "I'll go. I've already seen that you are going to harass me until no end if I don't agree, so I'll just say yes. Jasper agrees as well."

"Great!" I exclaimed. "See you at three!"

It turned out that everyone else in my family felt the same way. They didn't really want to go, but going was better than having me annoying them all night. Am I really that annoying? Oh well, at least I helped Nessie out. Maybe she'll buy me some candy now!

**Review please? :)**


	30. Chapter 30

**So this chapter is really short, and it kind of sucks, and I'd like to apologize for that, but I promise the next one will be better, because you will all get to find out what Nessie's prank is, then the Cullens (minus Nessie) will go on Emmett's midnight adventure. Then the chapter after that will be the aftermath of the prank. So please bear with me for this chapter and try not to give up on the story because it kind of sucks :P**

_Bella POV_

Since it was our last night at camp, we were having a fancy goodbye dinner. It was especially satisfying, since I knew I never had to come back to this place. Esme might try to make us return in the summer, but we all agreed that it was NEVER going to happen. EVER. Even if she tried to blackmail us with that stupid video, we wouldn't let it happen. We all decided that if the video is just posted online, there will be no way for Esme to blackmail us. Then, we will be free again.

Anyway, supper was a nice turkey dinner with ice cream for dessert (and sundaes for Emmett's cabin, because they won the snowball fight). Before we ate supper, Erika decided to make some last day announcements and stuff, but I mostly tuned her out. When she was done, she asked if anyone wanted to say anything. Nobody did, except Rosalie.

I had no idea why Rosalie would want to say anything, since she always hated camp more than any of us did, and she hated pretty much anyone she met here. She got up to the front and began to talk.

"Hello everyone. I just wanted to let you all know that my sister, Alice, cuddles with her credit cards for at least an hour every day. Usually it's two or three hours, but on the days where she's really busy, it's only one. Also, I hate you guys, and I never have to come back here. So screw you all!"

With that, Rosalie went and sat down. Shit. Maybe I shouldn't have told Rose the secret. Alice is going to be so mad at me. But then again, she knows that it was Jasper told me that the secret, so maybe I'll be ok. Or, maybe she'll just get mad at both of us. Who knows? I'm not really scared of her, so I'll be fine. Who am I kidding? I am totally scared of her.

_Alice POV_

I cannot believe that Rosalie told me secret to everyone. It is so embarrassing. I'm just going to have to kill her or something. Although, when I think about it, Bella was probably the one who told her the secret. It could have been Jasper, but I don't think he would do that after I punished him last time.

I figured that I needed to get back at Rosalie, or Bella, or possibly both of them, but I really was sick of fighting. I could probably take Bella, but then Edward and probably Nessie would get involved, then that would get Jacob involved, and I really am sick of it. And as for Rosalie, she really is just better at pranking than me, and I should probably admit defeat unless I want to die. I decided to just forget about it (for now) and have fun at the dance that was being hosted for the last night. The theme was James Bond, and it was going to be really cool. We had two game tables, one with Blackjack and one with Roulette (no real gambling, of course), and a 'bar' with mocktails. The counsellors had been planning it all week. We also had really cool decorations, and a chocolate fountain.

The dance was pretty uneventful, and when it was over we all had our snack, and then went to bed. Of course, I didn't sleep, but I had to pretend. I just waited until it was three so we could go on Emmett's stupid adventure. I had no idea what his plans were, but I really didn't want to go. Oh well, I guess it could be more fun than laying around and doing nothing.


	31. Chapter 31

**I don't own any Twilight related stuff or any banana related stuff. I'm not entirely sure how many chapters are left right now...less than five, but I'm not really sure. Just some for the aftermath of the prank and then the whole going home thing. And an epilogue, of course :)**

_Nessie POV_

After the dance, everyone went back to their cabins to go to bed. I pretended to be asleep until it was three, then I got up, put on my outside clothes and quietly snuck out of my cabin. I met Rachelle halfway between our cabins.

"You ready for this?" I asked.

"Hell yeah! I'm never coming back to this place either, so we might as well go out with a bang."

I giggled. "I don't think we'll ever be allowed back here. Our children probably won't even be allowed because of this."

We decided to get busy with our prank because we only had four hours, and we suspected that it would take at least three hours. That left us with only an hour to spare, and that wasn't a whole lot of safety time, especially considering that my family could be coming back from whatever Emmett came up with to distract them at any time.

"Ok, first we need to get everyone's bags, and I was thinking that we could bring them all to the dining hall so that we can do everything in one place," I said.

"Ok, good idea," Rachelle agreed. "Should we split up, or get one cabin together?"

"Well, it would probably be faster if we split up, that way we get more cabins done faster. And if one cabin is like, really far away, the other person could probably get two done during that time."

"Good point. Let's go!"

With that, we took off. It took us about an hour to get all the bags. Once we had them all sitting in the dining hall, we got to work. We had originally been planning to dump all the bags out, but we decided that we didn't have enough time to do that, so we just switched about five items out of every bag. When we were done, we had about an hour left, so we put all the bags back. We didn't know whose bag was whose, so we just made sure that there was a bag back in its place. Of course, we didn't mess with our own bags – we weren't trying to hide that it was us this time, so we might as well keep our lives easy.

When we were done, we went back to our separate cabins and went to bed. I knew I would be tired in the morning because I only had a few hours of sleep, but it would be totally worth it. Even all the trouble I would be in would be worth it.

_Edward POV_

At exactly 3am, I met my family out near Emmett's cabin. For some unknown reason, he wanted to go on an adventure. And I literally do mean unknown. When he asked me to come with him, he was singing the theme song for 'Bananas in Pyjamas' in his head. It's an annoying song, but man, is it ever catchy. It gets stuck in your head and doesn't leave for days.

When I met up with my family, they were all thinking similar thoughts to me (minus the banana song).

_"Why are we doing this?"_

_ "This is such a waste of time."_

_ "Emmett is an idiot."_

_ "I'm bored already and we haven't even gone anywhere"_

_ "BANANAS IN PYJAMAS ARE RUNNING DOWN THE STAIRS. BANANAS IN PYJAMAS ARE CHASING TEDDY BEARS."_

I decided to just ask, "Emmett, why are we doing this, again?"

"I just wanted us to have one more night to ourselves before we get home and we have no freedom to do random shit."

"Fair enough. Can we go, so this can be over?" I asked.

We set off. Emmett led us through the forest. We walked for about an hour before we ended up at the other end of the island.

"What are we doing here, Emmett?" I asked.

"I don't know," he answered.

"You don't know?" Rosalie questioned. "You brought us all the way over here and you don't freaking know what we're doing?"

"Well," Emmett explained. "It's an adventure. We do adventurous stuff.

"Yes, but what?" I asked, exasperated.

"I don't know," Emmett repeated.

_"Think, Emmett, think. What can we do? This is an island. There is an adventure. Holy shit, it's an island. We're going to float away. OMG. OMG. I can't handle this. What if we float away and never come back? Oh, wait. It's winter. That kind of stuff doesn't happen in the winter. We're frozen into the lake, so we can't float away. Right? RIGHT? Okay, get back on topic, Emmett. We need to find something to do. I know. We have to build an igloo. It's a Canadian tradition. Then, once we all build igloos, we can have igloo wars, and see who can burn down the other person's igloo first!"_

"I've got it, guys! Let's have an igloo war!"

"What is an igloo war?" Jasper asked.

"We all build igloos, then we see who can burn down everyone else's igloo first."

"Emmett, you can't burn down something that is made of snow. It will just melt," Jasper pointed out.

"Oh. Well, we will see who can melt everyone else's igloo first."

Surprisingly, everyone agreed. It was pretty much since we all just wanted to leave and it would be faster if we just did what Emmett wanted. We even let him win, just so that he wouldn't whine all the way back.

Letting Emmett win was a lot harder than it sounded. Everything went fine until it was just him and Jacob left. At that point, Jacob pretended that he couldn't start a fire so that Emmett could win. The only problem was, Emmett actually couldn't start a fire, so we had to wait an hour until he could do that. When he finally won, we were allowed to leave.

We walked back to our cabins, which took about an hour and a half (Emmett got scared by a rogue pinecone and wouldn't come out of a tree for half an hour. He only came down when Rosalie threatened him with nothing for two months).

When we got back to our cabins, it was 4:30am. We decided to just go to 'bed' until it was time to get up.

**Review please :) I understand that it's not as good as it used to be, but I'm not the same person I was two years ago. I'm trying to keep it the same :P And reviews still make my day :D**


	32. Chapter 32

**I don't really know what to say anymore, so enjoy the rest of the story, sorry if it sucks, I don't own Twilight. :)**

_Nessie POV_

When I woke up in the morning, the people in my cabin were in a state of confusion.

"This isn't my bag!"

"This isn't my stuff?"

"Where are my clothes?"

Seconds after everyone realized that their stuff was missing, Victoria blamed me. I wasn't surprised, I figured she'd know it was me almost right away.

"You did this, didn't you?" she asked.

I didn't know whether I should deny it or not. I mean, she definitely knew that it was me, but it might be a bit more fun just to deny it. There wasn't really anything anyone could do either way, so I really just needed to figure out which one would be more fun.

"Yeah, actually I did," I said. "And there's nothing you can do about it."

"I can send you to Erika's office."

"You could do that," I agreed. "But it would essentially be pointless, because, when you think about it, she's not going to be able to do anything either."

"Actually-" Victoria started, but I cut her off.

"What?" I asked. "What is she going to do? Ban me from activities? Oh, wait. There are no more activities. Kick me out of camp? Oh, wait. It's the last day, and I am never ever coming back, no matter how much my dad tries to pay you guys off to let me back in."

Victoria narrowed her eyes. "Is that how you got back in?"

"Yup."

"What about your friend?" she asked.

"I have no idea," I admitted. "But anyway, you guys can all have fun sorting this crap out. I'm out of here. See ya, losers," I said, and I walked out of the cabin.

I went to the dining hall to see what was going on. Like last year, they were doing lost and found pickup, but for some unknown reason, it was a little more hectic than last year. Erika was up at the front of the dining hall, trying to sort through everyone's stuff. When she saw me walk in, she said something to Caitlin, who took over her job, and came over to talk to me.

"What did you do?" she asked, exasperated.

I smiled. "I think it's pretty clear what I did."

She rolled her eyes. "Clear as mud, maybe. At first it seemed like everyone's bags were just switched around, which was a little inconvenient, but not horrible. Then it seemed like people were missing items from their luggage and were finding other peoples' stuff in their luggage. Then a bunch of people found pineapples in their luggage. So please, just tell me, what is the full extent of what you did? And where the heck did you get all the pineapples?"

"Well, what we did was switch a few things from everyone's bag, but then we couldn't remember whose bag was whose, so we just put them back in random places," I explained.

"What about the pineapples?" Erika asked.

"Strangely enough, I don't know anything about the pineapples. Kind of like that time my sister Bella randomly found a bunch of pineapples in her locker at school. We were just really confused."

"Look," Erika said. "It's the last day of camp, and I am very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very-"

"Okay, I get it. Moving on?" I asked.

"Very thankful," she finished, "that I never have to see you again."

"Ouch," I said. "That actually kind of hurt."

She ignored me and continued on, "So, can you please, just this one time, tell me the truth?"

Oh, the irony. "I swear, I am telling the truth this time. From the bottom of my heart, I promise, I am telling the truth."

"Hehehehe. Bottom," said a voice.

I turned around and saw Emmett standing there. He had clearly been listening to the whole conversation.

"You did it, didn't you?" I asked.

Emmett just burst into laughter. I decided to take that as a yes.

"I told you it wasn't me!" I exclaimed.

Erika sighed and said, "That's great. It really is. I obviously can't punish you for this, so just do me a favour and go away. I literally never want to see you again."

_Bella POV_

When I finally got down to the dining hall in the morning, I discovered everything in a state of disarray. Nobody really seemed to be able to tell me what was going on, so I finally decided to just wait for Edward to show up. Having access to everyone's mind can be pretty useful sometimes.

When he arrived, I asked him what was going on. It took him a minute to figure it out, but once he did, he explained the whole situation.

"Wow, that's intense," I said. "It certainly explains why my bag was missing this morning."

"It gets better," Edward told me.

"How so?" I asked.

"Guess who is responsible?"  
"No," I said.

"Yes," he said darkly.

"Not Michael Jackson!" I cried.

Edward just stared at me for a minute. Then he just asked, "What?"

"It was Nessie, wasn't it?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"That girl is in so much trouble when we get home!" I exclaimed. "She has been nothing but trouble for the whole week we have been here. It's almost as bad as last summer!"

"Don't go too hard on her," Edward told me. "Don't forget she's gonna get in a lot of shit from Esme too. You know that even though she's not actually one of her parents, she won't tolerate that kind of behaviour in her house."

"Yeah, kind of like that time Emmett accidentally destroyed her rosebush when he fell out the window. . ."

"No, it's nothing like that," Edward disagreed with me. "Good try though."

"I don't know what to do with her, Edward," I said.

"Well-"

"Hey, Bella!" Emmett yelled, running up to me.

"Not now, Emmett," I said. "I don't have time for you right now."

"Please?" Emmett asked. "I just want to tell you a knock knock joke."

"Emmett," I started.

"DON'T YOU WANT TO HEAR A KNOCK KNOCK JOKE?"

"Fine," I conceded. Sometimes it's just easier to agree with Emmett.

"Okay, you start."

"Knock knock?" I asked.

"Who's there?" Emmett replied.

I was confused. What was I supposed to say now? Emmett just laughed at my silence and ran off.

"Well, that was really stupid," I said. "Anyway, what are we going to do with her?"  
"I don't know, Bella. I don't know."

**Review please :D**


	33. Chapter 33

**Sorry this chapter is kind of short, but it just didn't fit when I tried to make it longer. I promise I'll update really soon though :) Also, you just might need to know that defenestrate means to throw someone or something out a window, in case you didn't already know. One of my teachers taught me that word and I thought it was pretty cool :P Also, sorry it took a couple days longer than expected, I didn't have internet access.**

_R__osalie POV_

It took three hours to get everyone's stuff sorted out. Needless to say, we were about an hour late for the pickup already. Erika had sent someone ahead to tell the parents that we were delayed so that they wouldn't worry, but I got the general feeling that they were all pretty pissed off.

When the stuff was finally sorted, Erika told us that it was time to announce the cabin awards.

"Okay, the award for the cleanest cabin is Eagle cabin. The award for the most cabin stars is Fisher cabin. The award for the best campfire performance is Emmett Cullen."

"Damn it! How did he win that again?" Alice cried in frustration.

Erika ignored Alice and continued with her speech. "You can pick up your awards on the way out. We all need to get down to the dock now, because we're already an hour-ow!" I looked up from my nails to see that Emmett had pushed Erika away from the microphone. Oh no. Damage control time.

"I'd like to thank my parents, my girlfriend, my . . ." Emmett began his (completely unnecessary) acceptance speech.

I barged up on stage and interrupted him. "Emmett," I said quietly, being careful not to talk into the microphone. "Everyone wants to get out of here, so please, just get off the stage."

"I will not get off the stage!" Emmett yelled into the microphone.

I tried again. "Emmett, you say one more word, and you will get nothing for three months. Understood?"

"Rosalie, you say one more word, and I'll defenestrate you. Understood?"

"You'll what?" I asked, confused. Before I could fully comprehend what happened (and that has to be pretty fast, considering my vampireness) Emmett pushed me off the stage. "Thank you, thank you very much!" he screamed. "Emmett has left the building!"

He is so going to get it. He knows I'm serious when I make these threats. I'm probably going to have to double his sentence just for this. Unless I find another way to punish him.

_Emmett POV_

Oh no. I am so gonna get it now. Well, actually, I'm not gonna get it. For a long time. Why did I push Rosalie off the stage? I mean, it was really funny, and I got to use the word defenestrate (it's my new favourite word) but was it really worth it? It definitely wasn't worth it. What am I gonna do for three months? Or more? Probably six months!

"Emmett, get a grip!" Edward said.

"Watch it, Eddie, or I'll push you out of the boat again," I warned.

"Emmett, we're not on the boat yet."

"I'll defenestrate you too!" I threatened.

Bella spoke up, "Um, you know, Emmett, defenestrate doesn't mean-"

"I know exactly what it means," I said. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm getting on the boat."

Unfortunately, I couldn't get on the boat for another half hour. That was an awkward half hour. When we finally got back to the mainland, I could see Esme and Carlisle waiting for us. I ran into Esme's arms and screamed "MOMMY!" Then (this is really embarrassing) I started to cry.

"What's wrong, honey?" she asked.

"Rosalie's being mean to me," I pouted.

"What's she doing?" Esme asked.

"She said nothing for three months," I sobbed.

"Well, what did you do?"

"I told her I would defenestrate her, then I pushed her off the stage," I explained.

"You know that defenestrate-"

"I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS!"

**Reviews? :) Emmett**** won't defenestrate you if you review :D**


	34. Chapter 34

**Last chapter everyone! Don't worry, there will be an epilogue, but I'm sorry to say there won't be a sequel to the sequel :( Enjoy :)**

_Esme POV_

Wow. This is literally a repeat of last year, with Emmett running into my arms. I don't mind, of course, because I missed my kids when they were gone. Well, mostly.

"Mom, we have so much to tell you!" Alice exclaimed.

"I'm sure you do," I smiled. "Although after the stories from last year, I'm not sure if I want to hear them."

"Trust me, you don't," Bella said. "But, I think you need to."

"That doesn't sound good," I sighed. "Let's at least get into the car first so that all the other parents don't think we're psycho."

"You know us so well," Alice giggled.

We all headed toward cars. Sadly, I still have to say that my children are not mature enough to civilly decide which car everyone is going to ride in. In the end, Carlisle and I had to decide that the girls would go with me and the boys would go with him.

"Please don't make me do that!" Jacob begged. "They're going to make me play the license plate game again!"

"The license plate game?" I asked, confused. "That doesn't sound so bad. Maybe a little boring."

"You have clearly never played this game with your children then," Jacob laughed dryly. "Last time, I was black and blue for three days!"

"Oh yeah, that license plate game," I said, remembering. "This is why I always take the girls."

_Bella POV_

Once we got in the car, Esme asked, "So, what did you guys do at camp?"

She was met with complete silence. "Not this again," she groaned.

"Well, you did say last year that you only wanted to hear the appropriate stories. So, I guess we're just honoring your wishes from last year."

"I'm probably going to regret this, but I'm just going to ask you to tell me all the stories, because, honestly, I'm going to find out about all the crap you did anyway. This way, you'll be able to explain your side of the story before I ground you all for life. Again."

"We actually didn't do a lot of stuff we shouldn't have this time. We only had a week, and you can't get that much done in such a short amount of time," Alice said innocently.

"Bullshit," said Esme. "I want to know everything."

Once again, nobody said anything.

"Come on," Esme said.

She was met with silence for the third time.

"I'll post that video," she threatened.

"I'm going to post that damn video myself," Alice said.

"That may be so," Esme smiled. "But you're stuck in a car with me for the next ten hours, so you might as well start talking now. I could make your life hell."

"You wouldn't!" Alice said.

"Oh, I so would," Esme shot back, and I was pretty sure she was serious.

_Jacob POV_

Once we got in the car, Emmett immediately yelled, "License plate game!"

"No, please, no!" I cried. "Carlisle, help me!"

Carlisle appeared to take pity on me and said, "Guys, before you beat Jacob up, why don't you tell me what happened at camp?"

"Billy-Bob beat me at poker again," Emmett said sadly.

"Who is Billy-Bob?" Carlisle asked.

"A rock," I said. "Billy-Bob is a rock."

"Oh," said Carlisle, looking a little disturbed. "Why don't you tell me about it, Emmett?"

"Well," Emmett began. "We were playing poker, and I had this really good hand. I had a straight flush, and I really thought I was gonna win, and then that bastard had a royal flush!"

"How does that even happen?" Carlisle asked, confused. "How can a rock . . ."

"Don't ask, Dad," Edward said. "Everyone's lives will be better if you just don't ask.

"Okay. Anyone else have any stories? Maybe some less disturbing stories?"

"Alice is probably going to kill me," Jasper spoke up. "I told Bella her biggest secret."

"And what would that be?" Carlisle asked.

"She cuddles with her credit cards every night for at least an hour."

"You know what?" asked Carlisle. "I think we should just not tell stories for the rest of this trip. If your mother wants to know, you can tell her at home. But I really don't want to know anything.


	35. Epilogue

**Well, this is the epilogue, and I'm sorry to say that there won't be any more after this, at least for now. I'm headed to university, so I don't expect to have time for this anymore :P But let's face it, Twilight isn't crazy popular like it was when I first wrote 'Cullens at Camp' and in a couple of years, nobody will care about this anyway :P So, enjoy the ending :)**

_Alice POV_

Unlike last time, I wasn't grounded for two months when we got back from camp. Actually, I wasn't grounded at all. Esme was going to ground both Rosalie and I, but in the end, she decided that enduring everything we did to each other (and the car ride back) was punishment enough.

We were all sitting in the living room one day, just playing video games and doing other various things when Esme and Carlisle announced that they were going on a hunting trip. Then, I had a vision that took place a few days later. Esme and Carlisle were returning from their hunting trip to find Emmett repainting the living room, Nessie braiding Jacob's hair, me giving Jasper, who is chained to a chair, a makeover (some things never change), Rosalie slipping something into Jake's drink, and Bella and Edward nowhere in sight. (Remember, I said in sight, not within hearing range).

The next part of the vision – to nobody's surprise – involves Esme sending us back to John Island for the summer. This simply cannot happen.

As soon as Carlisle and Esme left on their trip, I explained what was going on to my family. Just as I suspected, they were all equally horrified and agreed that there was only one thing to do. This led to a ten hour long house-wide search, which ended only after we found what we were looking for – the key to staying away from camp.

When Carlisle and Esme got back a few days later, the scene from my vision was playing out.

"That's it!" cried Esme. "I'm sending you back to John Island for the summer!"

I smiled and said, "No, actually, you're not."

"Yes, actually, I am."

"No, you're not," I repeated.

Esme gave me a Look. "I am your mother, and you will go if I tell you to go."

"Not this time," I told her. "There is absolutely nothing you can do to make us go."

Esme smiled. "Oh, but there is one thing. Remember that video? The one that you've been begging me not to post on YouTube for years?"

"Actually, I do," I said. "And I'm sure that half of the internet does too."

"What do you mean?" Esme asked, confused.

"I already posted the video. So now, you have absolutely nothing to blackmail or bribe us with. We are not going back. Bazinga!"

For the third time in the entire time I've known her, Esme was speechless.

"I think they've got you there," Carlisle chuckled.

Esme smiled after a minute. "I admit defeat. You don't have to go back to John Island."

"That's a good thing," Nessie piped up, "Because I think I'm banned for life."

"You're what?"

I didn't need to look into the future to see that this wouldn't be good, but I didn't really care. For one, I wasn't the one in trouble, and two, we never had to go back to John Island again. So, at least for now, we were all happy.

**The End. Please review! This is the last time I'll ask you guys this, so if you're still reading, surely you can spare one more review? :) See you around :)**


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